  
Leprachaun (Leprachaun)
Senior Member
Username: Leprachaun
Post Number: 285
Registered: 05-2003
| | Posted on Saturday, June 26, 2004 - 01:34 pm: | 
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My first brew gave me 2 trips which shone brilliantly. Amazing
gold and silver visuals, powerful jungle imagery, very profound
and spiritual. I have brewed many times since then. Lots were
duds, lots were potent, but none matched my first brew. |
Leprachaun (Leprachaun)
Senior Member
Username: Leprachaun
Post Number: 286
Registered: 05-2003
| | Posted on Saturday, June 26, 2004 - 02:42 pm: |
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I then started a long series of experiments to see if I could
improve on my first brew, mainly to reduce brewing time
and improve taste.
These were generally a disaster. I tried
using no acid, which doesnt work. I tried siphoning the
extractions and drinking the sediment. This works to some
degree with vine but not with dmt plants.
Then I discovered the "Dry Extraction". Who would ever
have thought you could brew without water, heh. It works to
some degree with vine and MH, but not PV. I guess raw leaf
powder is too hard to digest.
On one of these dry extraction trips I had my first experience of
what I call the "Tobacco Reaction". It has happened to me many
times since but this first time was one of the strongest. Basically
what happens is that you smoke a cigarette while tripping and
the trip gets stronger. The character of the trip also changes.
You get very profound insights into the nature of reality rather
than visuals. On this trip it was overwhelmingly painfully intense.
It was as if the sum total of all knowledge of everything past
present and future throughout the whole universe was gushing
through my mind like Niagra Falls. It was so painful I cried a bit.
I had some very destructive evil thoughts and kept thinking I was
God. Luckily I returned to earth in one piece.
The tobacco reaction only seems to happen if the vine dose is
low compared to the dmt dose, or if the vine brew has been
moderately overheated.
(Message edited by leprachaun on June 26, 2004) |
Leprachaun (Leprachaun)
Senior Member
Username: Leprachaun
Post Number: 287
Registered: 05-2003
| | Posted on Saturday, June 26, 2004 - 03:24 pm: |
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The lack of vine alkaloids seems to allow the tobacco to
muscle in and take over the trip. it is nice when mild but
terrible when intense.
I went back to regular brewing using vinegar instead of
lemon juice. I had lots of strong brews but they were all
meaningless and chaotic. They did not shine. I now think it
was mainly due to moderately overheating the vine brew, destroying
some essential component but leaving enough alkaloids to
protect the dmt and no more.
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Hippie3 (Admin)
Board Administrator
Username: Admin
Post Number: 21902
Registered: 02-2001
| | Posted on Saturday, June 26, 2004 - 03:32 pm: |
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quote:Amazing
gold and silver visuals,
i find this amazing,
my vision has been sometimes
about gold.
and the spirit in gold.
Namaste
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Hippie3 (Admin)
Board Administrator
Username: Admin
Post Number: 21903
Registered: 02-2001
| | Posted on Saturday, June 26, 2004 - 03:33 pm: |
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quote:due to moderately overheating the vine brew
another reason why i use a crock pot on Low.
Namaste
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Leprachaun (Leprachaun)
Senior Member
Username: Leprachaun
Post Number: 288
Registered: 05-2003
| | Posted on Saturday, June 26, 2004 - 03:37 pm: |
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Then I had my second overwhelming trip. This time with vine
and PV. I think it was mainly due to overheating the vine but
there may have been a tobacco reaction too. It was chaotic
and painful, and i went on my "I am God" buzz. I couldnt wait
for the trip to end and kissed the ground like the Pope when
it finally did. |
Leprachaun (Leprachaun)
Senior Member
Username: Leprachaun
Post Number: 289
Registered: 05-2003
| | Posted on Saturday, June 26, 2004 - 03:46 pm: |
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Hi Hippie3. I remember you talking about meeting the spirit of gold
before. Sounds fascinating. I only saw gold geometrics but I'm
sure if I took a big enough dose of a shining brew I would meet
silver and gold spirits, probably in the form of kings and queens.
Some of my brews had silver visuals, but only my first one had
gold. Seeing gold seems to be a feature of a truly shining brew.
I was brewing in several different places, using 5 different hobs,
all with their own controls to get used too. This is why I
overheated or destroyed so many brews. I realised that a small
increase in the hob setting can make the difference between a
potent brew and a dud. I presume a similar small increase makes
the difference between a brew that shines and one that doesnt.
(Message edited by leprachaun on June 26, 2004) |
Leprachaun (Leprachaun)
Senior Member
Username: Leprachaun
Post Number: 290
Registered: 05-2003
| | Posted on Saturday, June 26, 2004 - 03:49 pm: |
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It was my last trip which really killed me. 67g vine
and 2g potent shroom aborts.
For a start I was in very bad humour before I even took the
stuff. When I came up I became sexually aroused, which
is quite normal for me both on shrooms and aya. But then
it became ovewhelmingly intense and violent too. I had fantasies
about rape, gay sex, incest, paedophilia, bestialty, murder, torture,
self mutilation and suicide. I basically went totally insane.
What disturbed me the most about all this was that I ENJOYED
these fantasies and was on the verge of carrying them out.
When I came down I was totally disgusted with myself. The
trip triggered off the most serious period of depression I have
ever experienced. I saw myself as no better than any criminal
in jail for any crime. I had to get anti-depressants immediately
because I couldn't cope at all.
This trip happened 5 months ago and I have
only been off anti-depressants for a few weeks. I had to make
major changes in my head and in my life in order to recover.
Believe it or not, I think this experience has ultimately been
beneficial. I am a much more self-accepting person now.
(Message edited by leprachaun on June 26, 2004)
(Message edited by leprachaun on June 26, 2004) |
mycos eleusis (Exshroomer)
Moderator
Username: Exshroomer
Post Number: 1145
Registered: 05-2003
| | Posted on Saturday, June 26, 2004 - 09:21 pm: |
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Seems like something that definitely takes some strength to admit having gone through your head. Wow.....I had a few trips where past memories of being picked on as a kid, feeling helpless, etc., threw me into a spiral of super-violent revenge fantasies.
These are the things that make you wonder "From what corner of my mind did this shit emerge from?!"
Now I know what you meant when you called these trips "Soul-Crushing(?)" in a recent thread.
I wonder, how many more of us out there have had thoughts totally unlike the way we think we are creep out and hit us right in the face when tripping...especially during high-dose trips, or with things like the Aya. How does one deal with it?
Confrontations with the "Shadow", for sure. |
mycos eleusis (Exshroomer)
Moderator
Username: Exshroomer
Post Number: 1146
Registered: 05-2003
| | Posted on Saturday, June 26, 2004 - 09:27 pm: |
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Which leads the another question: Did you have any sense of contacting any entities during this?
And did these thoughts seem to come from "outside" of you?
Which leads to yet another thing:
All these reports of "Entity Contact".
Are they really entities existing on a higher vibrational plane that we access through the use of these entheogens, or are they fragments of our own psyches looking back at us, trying to tell us something?
A big question I've always had in my mind ever since I started having these experiences myself. |
Tehuti (Roo)
Senior Member
Username: Roo
Post Number: 233
Registered: 06-2004
| | Posted on Saturday, June 26, 2004 - 10:40 pm: |
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This is a part of all of us. This is another part of who we are. No shame in this. I would have to say that the vine reached deep inside of your humanity and showed you another aspect of your humanity.
I too have had such experiences. My own where "mad thoughts" of becoming a pin head type creature and doing what those things do. At first I was disturbed, until I realized this is who we are, we are GOD as well as Devil, we created them from our own image. Its our reality...
I too use tobacco with my brew. I actually make the brew with a small amount of tobacco. As horrible as it sounds it works well. I have found MOAI'sMO AI's and shrooms to be very unpredictable. I keep a good sitter around just in case. Most of the time, if I do 5 grams plus an MAOI I become truly alien, literally...
I am pleased to finally coorespond with you! I have read many of your posts in the archives. If I where you I would spend a little time listening to a few Alan Watts lectures. You may find a few answers in them regarding your experience.
On another note. I have found that when I use an MAOI and things go too far, I get some relief by smoking a joint. This does not work for everyone. With Ayahuasca, if things got too nuts, I take a long, VERY hot bath. I always have my sitter with me during this phase. I have honestly had my most profound experiences in the tub...
Again, there is no shame in knowing what lay inside humanity, no shame in knowing that what you saw, the dark side, coexists with Jesus, Buddha, Gandi, all at once inside of you. These things exist in all of us. Who you are depends on what you do with it, not that it is a part of your species..
(Message edited by roo on June 26, 2004)
They're trained to believe, not to know. Belief can be manipulated. Only knowledge is dangerous.
-Frank Herbert, Dune Messiah
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The Gnome (Grimblegrumble)
Senior Member
Username: Grimblegrumble
Post Number: 401
Registered: 12-2003
| | Posted on Saturday, June 26, 2004 - 11:08 pm: |
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I have recently been reading Hallucinogens and Shamanism edited by Michael J. Harner, a collection of papers and studies on, well, shamanistic use of hallucinogens. Anyway I have found it enlightening on several points. One, that tobacco use with Ayahuasca is very common, usually it was drank as tobacco juice. So that's nothing new. Also, in the book they talk about use in several different tribes thorough out South America and not all use is for good. Until now, all the use that I read of was for healing group sessions that were uses of good in my opinion. But in this they highlight uses that varied from group uses for healing as well as individual use for "witchcraft" to curse others, sometimes to death. This book has reopened my eyes to something I use to just assume, but had forgotten. That is that any drug can be both good or bad and used in either context. No drug is inherantly good or bad, but must be decidedly used either way, if that is your intent. If you just use and do not have or declare a specific intent, but leave it open, I believe you leave yourself very vulnerable for anything, good or bad. Especially I think that this applies to Ayahuaska. That is my opinion...
(Message edited by grimblegrumble on June 26, 2004)
So it goes...
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Redmonk (Redmonk)
Senior Member
Username: Redmonk
Post Number: 577
Registered: 10-2002
| | Posted on Sunday, June 27, 2004 - 02:02 am: |
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Very wise and true words Gnome . |
Lep (Leprachaun)
Senior Member
Username: Leprachaun
Post Number: 291
Registered: 05-2003
| | Posted on Sunday, June 27, 2004 - 03:34 am: |
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Thanks for all your tolerant replies. I will tell you about how I
recoverd.
My last trip totally shattered my self-image as a nice guy and left
me with the self-image of being extremely evil. I could't tolerate
this and I wanted to die. I took an anti-depressant called Lustral
and it put me on a great buzz. It was while I was buzzing on
this stuff that the necessary mental changes were able to take
place.
I realised that within me there are two selves which I call the
"Social Self" and the "Free Self". The social self wants to be liked
and accepted by other people, to be seen as a "nice guy", cool etc.
The free self, on the other hand, basically doesnt give a fuck.
It thinks and feels without judgement or restraint of any kind.
This is an enormous source of guilt and shame for the social
self. There is a constant battle between them for control.
During my trip, my social self was almost turned off totally.
All the fantasies of my free self, which my social self would
usually repress immediately out of horror, came gushing
into conciousness. Luckily there was enough of my social
self still working to stop me acting on the fanasies.
When I came down, my social self was naturally horrified
and every last bit of self esteem I had was gone. My social
self felt extremely guilty and wanted to die.
(Message edited by leprachaun on June 27, 2004) |
Lep (Leprachaun)
Senior Member
Username: Leprachaun
Post Number: 292
Registered: 05-2003
| | Posted on Sunday, June 27, 2004 - 03:40 am: |
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Over time I realised that the social self has to accept the free
self because it is the source of inspiration, art, etc not just evil
fantasies. The free self has to accept the social self because
it allows the free self to express itself in this social world
without getting thrown in jail. |
Lep (Leprachaun)
Senior Member
Username: Leprachaun
Post Number: 293
Registered: 05-2003
| | Posted on Sunday, June 27, 2004 - 11:12 am: |
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I think spirits and gods etc are ultimately parts of the self, but this is only fully realised when you are at one with the universe.
While we are mere mortals, they are seen as separate entities.
The thoughts I had were mine, generated by myself. Maybe on a lower dose I may have been able to pass them off as coming from an evil spirit, But on this occasion I had to face the fact that they were my own. Very hard to take.
I think we all have the potential to be Jesus or Satan. The potential for extreme good and extreme evil is within us all.
It is up to ourselves which path we choose. But for full self-acceptance, you have to acknowledge your own evil. I think this is the idea behind confession.
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Hippie3 (Admin)
Board Administrator
Username: Admin
Post Number: 21966
Registered: 02-2001
| | Posted on Sunday, June 27, 2004 - 07:32 pm: |
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quote: I saw myself as no better than any criminal
in jail for any crime.
in truth,
we aren't any better.
except that we control our urges.
but we still have them,
and there's nothing wrong with
that truth,
it's human nature,
just a part we hide in polite society.
Namaste
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Hippie3 (Admin)
Board Administrator
Username: Admin
Post Number: 21967
Registered: 02-2001
| | Posted on Sunday, June 27, 2004 - 07:35 pm: |
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i have never use tobacco in my brew,
and never would.
nicotine can kill you.
Namaste
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ShedTheMonkey (Shedthemonkey)
Advanced Member
Username: Shedthemonkey
Post Number: 85
Registered: 06-2004
| | Posted on Sunday, June 27, 2004 - 07:55 pm: |
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quote:we aren't any better.
except that we control our urges
The old philosopher Thomas Hobbes said something like (heavily paraphrasing) that we all must give up our natural tendancies to murder, rape, incest, etc. in a social contract so other people won't do these things to us. In order for us to have a relatively safe and prosperous society we must give up some of our rights in cooperation with others. The Monkey is still very strong in all of us. It is a struggle to shed it. 
ShedTheMonkey
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Leprachaun (Leprachaun)
Senior Member
Username: Leprachaun
Post Number: 294
Registered: 05-2003
| | Posted on Monday, June 28, 2004 - 09:43 am: |
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Hi guys, I have some great news. I drank a brew last night and it shone beautifully!!!
The dose was 30g white bc and 26g hawaiian pv brewed with vinegar on a VERY LOW hob setting.
Here is my trip report:
0.00-0.30 Drank bc
1.00-2.00 Drank pv
1.30 Starting to trip. Everything shimmers when I blink my eyes.
1.42 Eyes quite dilated. Pins and needles in hands.
2.00 Tripping well. Very cold. Feel like and old woman (?)
2.17 Been getting strong jolts like electric shocks
2.48 Coming down. Had great visuals, Some amazing chrome plated geometrics. Had to switch off the lights. Felt some digestive movements and the trip suddenly left me.
3.00 Massive sudden puke
3.10 Trip suddenly got very strong again.
3.16 Pins and needles, lights off again.
3.35 Coming down.
5.40 Almost fully down. Had big meal and fell asleep.
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Leprachaun (Leprachaun)
Senior Member
Username: Leprachaun
Post Number: 295
Registered: 05-2003
| | Posted on Monday, June 28, 2004 - 10:22 am: |
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I was fairly confident the brew would shine because I tested my new hob to see how it heated pots of water and I prepared and brewed the herbs very carefully,
It was my first shining brew since my very first brew in June last year. It has taken me a long time to get back on track and I am so happy and relieved now. I greatly needed a shining brew to cure me after all the shit I have been through, most of which I haven't mentioned.
During the first peak I had brilliant geometric visuals. The chrome was the best, it was so vivid. I felt like I was an old woman, just like in my first 2 trips. My hands looked old, I could see myself with grey hair and wearing a shawl. It was as if I was turning into someone else. So strange.
I also got strong jolts through my body for no apparent reason. Never got this before. I also had the pins and needles in my hands and the aversion to light which I haven't had since my first brew.
It was strange how the first peak ended quite abruptly, apparently in response to some digestive movements I could feel in my abdomen.
Then I had a massive sudden puke and I was very lucky to be near the toilet or it would have all been on the floor. Just as I had cleaned myself up and sat down, the trip rapidly and strongly intensified, much to my surprise. I got the pins and needles again and had to switch off the lights becuase they bugged me.
In this second peak I came into contact with the vine spirit. Oh it was so wonderful!!! |
Leprachaun (Leprachaun)
Senior Member
Username: Leprachaun
Post Number: 296
Registered: 05-2003
| | Posted on Monday, June 28, 2004 - 10:49 am: |
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I started talking some strange language, it was ayahuasca language, and it sounded like some kind of native language from south america. i was sure that if I spoke in this language to natives they would understand me.
I realised that "healthiness is horniness". Being horny all the time is a sign of good health.
I realised that I must learn to digest the brew properly. I have always had digestive problems and the vine is going to cure me. There are many tensions in my digestive system which are blocking the absorption f the brew. The vine is going to release them for me. That is why I had to eat buttered toast up to now in order to release the brew. Bad digestion. I didn't have to eat toast this time because the vine was curing my digestion and released that particular blockage. Later on when I did eat toast t had no effect on the trip. All the alkaloids had been absorbed already. Hooray!
I smoked lots of cigarettes but had no tobacco reaction. The vine was potent and in control.
I was drinking tap water like I always do and suddenly I could taste all the impurities n it. It tasted metallic and awful. I realised I should only drin purified water, like what I brew the vine with. Also, I realised that cigarettes are highly processed and polluted dogshit. I should only smoke organic cigars.
When eating toast, I could taste the burnt carbon on itand I had to spit it out. Never happened before. The vine is teaching me how to taste.
I realised that I am quite ill both physica |
Leprachaun (Leprachaun)
Senior Member
Username: Leprachaun
Post Number: 297
Registered: 05-2003
| | Posted on Monday, June 28, 2004 - 11:15 am: |
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I realised that I am quite ill both physically and spirituallly. I thought i wasn't too bad but the vine showed me what true health and happiness is and I am a long way short of it.
The vine said it is going to cure me, and when I am cured I will be able to help the vine cure other people too. Curanderos don't cure people, they only help the vine to cure.
I am going to be a doctor when I am cured. A true doctor that helps the vine bring people to true health. Regular doctors with their medicines are idiots. They should be banned. They haven't a clue.
They are like cavemen trying to fix a computer. Their methods are barbaric. They don't know what true health is because they are sick themselves.
I will have to drink the brew many more times to clarify these insights. I am sick and in a state of confusion. They vine will cure me and make everything clear. I am very excited.
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Hippie3 (Admin)
Board Administrator
Username: Admin
Post Number: 22048
Registered: 02-2001
| | Posted on Monday, June 28, 2004 - 03:10 pm: |
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now you went and made me crave a brew.
i'm off to my laboratory!!
Namaste
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? (Superunborn)
Senior Member
Username: Superunborn
Post Number: 232
Registered: 04-2004
| | Posted on Monday, June 28, 2004 - 05:35 pm: |
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Sounds like a great, productive session. It's what was missing from my first experience... |
The Gnome (Grimblegrumble)
Senior Member
Username: Grimblegrumble
Post Number: 404
Registered: 12-2003
| | Posted on Monday, June 28, 2004 - 08:14 pm: |
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Good deal Leprachaun!
I am happy for you!
So it goes...
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Tehuti (Roo)
Senior Member
Username: Roo
Post Number: 253
Registered: 06-2004
| | Posted on Wednesday, June 30, 2004 - 03:05 am: |
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Curanderos cure themselves and with that knowlege, allow the vine to work through them. You are well on your way. Having this vision was your initiation.
They're trained to believe, not to know. Belief can be manipulated. Only knowledge is dangerous.
-Frank Herbert, Dune Messiah
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Leprachaun (Leprachaun)
Senior Member
Username: Leprachaun
Post Number: 298
Registered: 05-2003
| | Posted on Wednesday, June 30, 2004 - 08:18 am: |
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Can anyone recommend the best type of vine to get from iamshaman. I need more soon. Is the US young red any good? |
Hippie3 (Admin)
Board Administrator
Username: Admin
Post Number: 22191
Registered: 02-2001
| | Posted on Wednesday, June 30, 2004 - 12:44 pm: |
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i hear the older thicker vine is best.
Namaste
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Redmonk (Redmonk)
Senior Member
Username: Redmonk
Post Number: 589
Registered: 10-2002
| | Posted on Wednesday, June 30, 2004 - 01:26 pm: |
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"i hear the older thicker vine is best."
Heh he....is that what yer wife told you ? |
Hippie3 (Admin)
Board Administrator
Username: Admin
Post Number: 22202
Registered: 02-2001
| | Posted on Wednesday, June 30, 2004 - 01:38 pm: |
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thx,
i needed that.
Namaste
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Leprachaun (Leprachaun)
Senior Member
Username: Leprachaun
Post Number: 299
Registered: 05-2003
| | Posted on Wednesday, June 30, 2004 - 05:38 pm: |
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hehe :-)
Hippie3, by any chance do you post at aya.com under the name "Health"?
The avatar looks like something I saw on shrooms. |
Hippie3 (Admin)
Board Administrator
Username: Admin
Post Number: 22223
Registered: 02-2001
| | Posted on Wednesday, June 30, 2004 - 05:44 pm: |
|
nope,
haven't posted there in a long time,
and never with that nick.
Namaste
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Hippie3 (Admin)
Board Administrator
Username: Admin
Post Number: 22264
Registered: 02-2001
| | Posted on Thursday, July 01, 2004 - 12:35 pm: |
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test...
Namaste
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I_am_me (I_am_me)
Senior Member
Username: I_am_me
Post Number: 2070
Registered: 10-2003
| | Posted on Thursday, July 01, 2004 - 05:06 pm: |
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Hrmmm I've very well versed in mushrooms and lsd. I am now ready to venture into ayahuasca. I have a long week alone. I've never even thought of the idea of a sitter before until I came here and hear people talking about it. I just always ate the 10 strip and wondered around my yard! Lol. But anyhow.....would you guys stronly advise against using ayahuasca for the first time while alone? I feel comfortable being alone on drugs, actually I enjoy it...but I have no prior experience with Aya so I'm just looking for opinions...
"Emancipate yourself from mental slavery, none but ourselves can free our minds."
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Redmonk (Redmonk)
Senior Member
Username: Redmonk
Post Number: 592
Registered: 10-2002
| | Posted on Thursday, July 01, 2004 - 05:15 pm: |
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I've always done it alone . Start with a "medium" dose to get a feel for it . May your visions be revealing and your nausea be bearable ! |
Hippie3 (Admin)
Board Administrator
Username: Admin
Post Number: 22319
Registered: 02-2001
| | Posted on Friday, July 02, 2004 - 12:17 pm: |
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quote:.....would you guys stronly advise against using ayahuasca for the first time while alone?
tough call,
my instinct is to always go with the
'better safe than sorry' doctrine.
but aya is not like sally,
you'll see/feel it coming.
aya also does not,
at least in my experiences,
give one that paranoid utterly worthless
state that shrooms can.
so if i had to be bold,
i think one could dose aya alone.
at least, an experienced psychonaut could.
Namaste
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I_am_me (I_am_me)
Senior Member
Username: I_am_me
Post Number: 2085
Registered: 10-2003
| | Posted on Friday, July 02, 2004 - 05:03 pm: |
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quote:i think one could dose aya alone.
at least, an experienced psychonaut could.
 I think its about time then. I'm gonna try to start following diet restrictions now and figure something out over the weekend. I'll report back my findings. Thanks.
"Emancipate yourself from mental slavery, none but ourselves can free our minds."
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