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Chocolates from hell, a cautionary tale.


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#1 JACKOLANTERN

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Posted 12 April 2017 - 09:00 AM

It all started innocently enough over 8 years ago  some elves were busy making the psilos grow in abundance. 4 different varieties and a large one "just for shits and giggles" were thrown into the blender and ground into dust.

All in all each of these magical truffles had 3.5 grams in each one.  Black vulture was along for the ride to help out. He added his prayers to the magic that was brewing in the kitchen that day.

 

Into the blender went the 4 horsemen and ground to dust 84 dried grams.

The horsemen were:

Orissa, APE uncut, Penis envy, and malabar.

 

Then into a cauldron went 1/2 cup of peanut butter the "the creamy shit", 1/3 cup of ground graham cracker crumbs,  1/3 cup of honey and the dust of magic! It was mixed until a ball was formed and slightly more honey to give it a plastic consistency enough to be rolled into 24 1.5" balls. This went into the freezer of doom! till firm. Next chocolate of the darkest depths of hell was melted in a small crock pot slowly on low till smooth and then a few seed chips were added to temper it. Into a bowl was nuked till melted was white chocolate "after all we must have a balance between light and dark!

 

The truffles were pulled from the freezer with care in hopes someone screaming the back room "What the fuck are you doing!" soon would be there to help out with this endeavor. It was the Black vulture, breathing wisps of smoke from his beak. He then clawed at the truffles dipping them into the darkness and placing them carefully on the baking pan and then dipped his beak into the white and making striations them across the tops like a professional chocolateer. He grunted and groaned over them like Mako from Conan the Barbarian drawing mystical glyphs on his body as he applied the chocolate over the tops. I thought to myself this will be great!

 

They were then placed in the freezer to harden and then into little paper cups with care. A friend came over later that week to sample the wares, we each gleefully looked at these beauties and each popped one in our mouths expecting to be satisfied in our journey. The taste was excellent, Honey, peanut butter and a slight hint of earthiness. Wholesome goodness we thought... This will be fun we thought...

 

The ride went slowly as we put on some chill house music. Then it escalated higher and higher and higher, The walls melted the carpet marched, the heat waves from objects came into view all over everything, I then thought I have done it! I have killed myself! 9 hours of intense blastoff and then just an abrupt stop back into this plane of existence safe and sound with both of us in tears telling each other that "we will never do that again!" Nope their is no never, When you need your ass psychically handed to you these have the best kung fu around.

 

Black vulture laughed at us the entire time and grunted his blessings and curses...

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#2 OGNate

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Posted 13 June 2017 - 09:55 PM

Love the narration haha

 

I like how you made these, my girlfriend wants to try mushrooms but is an incredibly picky eater so I was looking for a good chocolate recipe and I think I found it.  Thanks for the great idea.


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#3 Arathu

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Posted 13 June 2017 - 10:02 PM

Fucking awesome!

 

A


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#4 Heirloom

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Posted 13 June 2017 - 10:42 PM

I loved reading this you got quite an imagination.
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#5 Arathu

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Posted 15 June 2017 - 09:30 AM

The talent in this community is staggering..................IMHO

 

A


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#6 PsyBearknot

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Posted 15 June 2017 - 10:49 AM

Was it just a strong 3.5 grams or was there something that caused a synergistic effect and upped the potency?
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#7 Heirloom

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Posted 19 June 2017 - 12:06 AM

I think mushrooms and chocolate work in synergy. I read somewhere that MJshroomer told someone to try the combo.
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#8 MLBjammer

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Posted 19 June 2017 - 03:35 AM

I have been making chocolates for years.  I don't know if the chocolates intensify the trip, but they sure are good for long-term storage and eliminating the taste.  As long as you use dark (semi-sweet) chocolate, you can easily melt it on a double boiler (just a pan with some water with another pan on top, turned to a very low setting on the stove) and then mix in your ground shrooms.  You can add other stuff to the chocolates, but the basic dark chocolate is hard to beat and tastes pretty good.

 

Nice post, Jack.


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#9 Spooner

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Posted 21 June 2017 - 12:01 AM

Melts in your hand...

then melts your mind...            :tongue:


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#10 CatsAndBats

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Posted 21 June 2017 - 08:27 AM

Melts in your hand...

then melts your mind...            :tongue:

 

 

tenor.gif

 

 

 

 

 

post-147940-0-39998700-1498051543.jpg

 

Dark chocolate, psilly (2.5g), salt, soy lecithin, cayenne. The kids love them. 

Attached Thumbnails

  • chocolate.jpg

Edited by CatsAndBats, 21 June 2017 - 08:28 AM.

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#11 PsyBearknot

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Posted 21 June 2017 - 09:40 AM

+100 for the soy lethicin!
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#12 Arathu

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Posted 21 June 2017 - 09:50 AM

I always liked Mr. T ....................... AKA, BA................

 

If you feed my children cayenne pepper chocolates in stead of feeding ME cyan mushroom chocolates.........

 

I'm leaving them there with you for the night while I tend to my mushrooms..............

 

Mr dark chocolate guy...........

 

Don't roll your eyes at me Mr................ :biggrin:  Man I'm getting old.....I sound like a freaking parent or something.........

 

A


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#13 CatsAndBats

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Posted 21 June 2017 - 09:54 AM

I always liked Mr. T ....................... AKA, BA................

 

If you feed my children cayenne pepper chocolates in stead of feeding ME cyan mushroom chocolates.........

 

I'm leaving them there with you for the night while I tend to my mushrooms..............

 

Mr dark chocolate guy...........

 

Don't roll your eyes at me Mr................ :biggrin:  Man I'm getting old.....I sound like a freaking parent or something.........

 

A

 

 

Not those kind of kids! Millennials.


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#14 Arathu

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Posted 21 June 2017 - 09:58 AM

Hahahahahahahaha..................... :tongue:


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#15 phlegmbae

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Posted 21 June 2017 - 08:47 PM

Geeky, Cheeky, and Fucking Freaky!


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#16 JACKOLANTERN

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Posted 01 November 2018 - 03:53 PM

I think a small amount of cayenne pepper or even cracked pepper corns in the chocolate plus a pinch of sea salt on the top of the confections would taste exquisite.  Although I am a chili head my self so I will leave the ghost pepper ones to me.



#17 PJammer24

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Posted 01 November 2018 - 03:58 PM

You know Black Vulture also?? Small world!!


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#18 JACKOLANTERN

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Posted 01 December 2018 - 03:46 PM

You know Black Vulture also?? Small world!!

Yes sir I do.



#19 JACKOLANTERN

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Posted 01 December 2018 - 03:48 PM

I always liked Mr. T ....................... AKA, BA................

 

If you feed my children cayenne pepper chocolates in stead of feeding ME cyan mushroom chocolates.........

 

I'm leaving them there with you for the night while I tend to my mushrooms..............

 

Mr dark chocolate guy...........

 

Don't roll your eyes at me Mr................ :biggrin:  Man I'm getting old.....I sound like a freaking parent or something.........

 

A

I wouldn't feed your children pepper chocolates. I reserve those for myself.






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