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Growing and Building

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#1 Akari


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Posted 12 September 2017 - 10:17 AM

Hey Topiates! I really miss you guys. Maybe many of the people here now don't even know me, but those of you who did, know I've been battling my own maturity (for the lack of a better way of summing it up.) I posted on here about wanting a threesome and hating my family and such like that.


I've finally reached (some level) of maturity. I've started to work on my vibration instead of wallowing in misery. I've started to discipline myself and family into cleaning, worked on controlling my anger and stress levels, both at home and at work. I've focused my minds eye to manifesting the next things in my life. After about 12 years of searching, I've finally done LSD, and it has taught me even more. Learning to control my own state, no matter what is happening around me. Grooming myself. Getting up earlier, meditation. Putting a routine on my life.


Another weird thing. Very very very very weird for me. I've decided to give myself to religious practices. I've talked about religion quite a bit here before, but for those who don't know, I believe in many different things from many different religions. My essential belief is that all the books and religions mean one thing to me. That there is something. And it communicates with us. And since I have found something in my own life to fith that same description, it's easy to believe someone else has this experience. But I also take them all with a grain of salt because there are many possible translations, misinterpretations, and outright forgeries. I loved and hated religion. I personally enjoy it, but it seems like it something that some people can't handle. Stops people from thinking for themselves. So I didn't believe in religious practice, just spirituality


However, I have decided to return to pagan practices. For a few reasons.


1. When I was a teenager, I practiced Wicca, At that time, I experienced the spirit realm greater than almost any other experience I've had OTHER than the psychedelia.

2. My wife is a Celtic pagan. And she wants to teach the kids this as their base idea of God, of course I'll teach them Shamanism as well.

3. And it helps me gain discipline  and structure. And DMT has taught me the reality of the power of magick, and I have been touched by it.


It's like I almost believe all religions, but I have just chose my favorite one.

Edited by Akari, 12 September 2017 - 10:18 AM.

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#2 Alder Logs

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Posted 12 September 2017 - 03:20 PM

A very positive report, Akari.   Sounds like you are in a much better space.  Keep it fluid, meaning, avoid establishing in any dogmatic positioning.   This is the danger inherent in religions.  


I like what I know of paganism, at its roots, but I always joke that I would undoubtedly circle in the wrong direction.   I view shamanism in only the most general terms, knowing it has varied greatly in detail from culture to culture.    But I think its power is in seeing beyond the physical, something the psychedelicized being generally finds little doubt about. 



As far as maturing goes, what grace it is that gets us through being young.   Keep your eye on your being and cut yourself slack for where you've been.   This will create compassion for all the rest of us, all finding our ways.   You have come to a place where you can be thankful.   Being thankful is a magnet for grace.   I trust you've turned a corner that your heart will not let you go back around.    When we can see the hard patches we've been through were there just for us, anger and feelings of injustice lose their power over us. 



Live and act as if you have no rights.



I know that's a mysterious and hard to swallow idea, but consider the wisdom in it. 


Great to hear from the new you.   Our expressions as persons are not, will never be, stable.   Seeing that is a true blessing, isn't it?   Keep growing and building.



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#3 Heirloom


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Posted 12 September 2017 - 05:23 PM

Akari I remember you , you sound much happier. good to see you back here.

#4 Sidestreet


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Posted 12 September 2017 - 05:32 PM


I've been battling my own maturity


That is very insightful!  Good to see you man.  :)

#5 PsyBearknot



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Posted 13 September 2017 - 04:52 AM

Howdy l, and as always welcome

#6 Akari


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Posted 13 September 2017 - 09:50 AM

Alder, I have learned to be very thankful. And the words of Mooji are not too hard to understand. I've been listening to his Satsangs for about three years now. His words have helped me to advance quite a bit. Live as if you have no rights pretty well encompasses my new mindset. Eternally grateful for the breath I breathe. Even pain seems to be a priceless wonder when it is present. Watching the tsunami around me, while my water is still. 


I have no dogmatic positioning whatsoever. I wish all the religions could see the truth in their truth, without seeing the division of their disagreements. DMT was a great teacher for me. Seeing all the gods of the pantheon, from different religions. I've seen Hindu gods and goddesses. I've seen the Buddha, seraphim, and interacted with the Christian God, and like the bible said, he didn't show his face. I've seen the beings who make the weather, and the book of life. Seeing these things made me realize, seeing this is the first part. How do I explain this vision to someone who has not seen it? That's when I realized the difference in religion. Arjuna saw Krishna, Moses discovered I am. The same I am the Buddha discovered, but in a different light. How can anyone explain this vision of the other side?


Us psychonauts have very likely seen more than Moses did in his vision, but our species has become Jaded by miracles. The Eclipse this year would have been seen as a divine interaction 5000 years ago, but now we have science to explain things, and IMO, science just makes the creator even more mysterious. The way I view God as every living being ever, I can understand every religion. Even God, the singularity in the Bible referred to itself as, "Us." Saying, "Let us create man in our image, and after our likeness." From that, I can extrapolate aliens, or spirit beings, which, for the lack of a better understanding in them, would also be alien. The Vedas (Hindu scriptures for those currently uneducated in the subject) describe the Brahman. Then Krishna. To me, that Mirrors the father and the Son. The division between religions comes from ignorance. Who's to say what being a man saw thousands of years ago. Jesus sounds like Osiris? Yeah, maybe be Jesus and Osiris are the same story written by different cultures. Different words, and different ideological backgrounds. Jews understood blood sacrifice, So maybe God spoke to them with blood, And why blood is so important in the Christian faith. And I believe whatever motif speaks to you is the religion you should choose. And to me, even atheism is a belief system. People fight and argue for it. its like a religion, a brainwashing hard to train out. My mind stays open, I have chosen this religious practice simply because it feels good. And since I believe in all the religions, instead of NOT believing in them, it creates a spiritual flexibility. While practicing paganism, I still follow the ways of Tao, and Buddha, I believe the science of the Vedas, and the deep truth in the parables of the Bible, all at the same time.


I believe paganism focuses on the energies naturally present. It speaks to the god/dess within. Magick is using your power of manifestation using the power of word. Everything is a gift from the earth, and I feel like that's the only spirit worth "worshiping". The mountains, the forest, the beach. The undeniable power of these things. The sunrise and sunset. The first chill of the year, the first swing into autumn. The first snowfall. The first firefly. These things to me are undeniable interaction between us and the spirit of nature. And the more you embed yourself in that stream, it seems the more the whole universe unfolds for you.

Edited by Akari, 13 September 2017 - 09:50 AM.

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#7 Akari


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Posted 13 September 2017 - 10:03 AM

Also, on a side note. I've done a bit of LSD now. I had never done it before. I tried it once before, but it was really really week. Or something. Or an RC. I took 4 hits, and barely felt anything. First time I got off on it was Christmas. Now that I've done LSD quite a bit, I realize, no amount have I ever BARELY FELT. For my birthday, I dropped 499 mikes. I think that's as much as I ever wanna do. I don't really like LSD as much as the others. It feels like it takes a bigger toll on my brain. IDK.

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