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What have I become?


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#61 Alder Logs

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Posted 19 January 2018 - 01:14 AM

Is believing ourselves to be the psychological mind limiting ourselves to what we think of ourselves as and no more, really bullshitting ourselves?   The fact of the variability should be proof enough that it's a bullshit story.  

 

So, if we are not what we think we are, perhaps the question of what we are might bear a little more inquiry.   If we can cop to the notion that we are not the stories we tell ourselves, we might continue by eliminating anything we can see that we are not.   What will be left of us when the job is done?   One might just stand there and laugh out loud (kind of like what happens sometimes on psychedelics).   


Edited by Alder Logs, 19 January 2018 - 01:19 AM.


#62 Mewman

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Posted 19 January 2018 - 02:36 PM

Here's some one who has done much research in to traumas have carried one since i was born i believe didn't know this till i'd heard of Stans work back in the seventies but never followed up .https://youtu.be/dswm2eCb-WE


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#63 Alder Logs

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Posted 19 January 2018 - 08:43 PM

That was really nice.  Thanks.   Here it is in an embed:

 

[Direct Link]


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#64 bennylava

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Posted 24 January 2018 - 10:39 PM

Thanks for posting that. It was very worth listening to. The guy definitely speaks my language.



#65 bennylava

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Posted 25 January 2018 - 06:33 PM

He mentioned something in the vid about taking psychedellics and starting to experience yourself as not the body-ego.

 

That is what scared the sh1* out of me. I don't believe that I am the body, but I still see the body as something I desperately need (for now at least) and that I must hang on to and protect with great care. As nearly all humans do. To be separated from it was unacceptable. Or to not feel connected to it. Couldn't tell if I was alive or dead, and that was NOT cool. I understand that in some way, this was my failing. But this is also a defense mechanism, that was put in place for very good reasons. So it has its place and should be respected. Now if I was 90 years old, I may not have freaked out at all, as I would likely deem that the time to ditch the body was nearly upon me anyway. And if it happened, oh well not such a huge deal. But I need to finish this life in the natural way, still have much to do here, so I freaked out when it started to appear as though I may actually be already dead.

 

I think if you want to have a 100% chance of not experiencing the exact type of freak out that I did, you need to be at peace with death. I was not. If I were, then I would not have been able to freak out. I would have had the thoughts and just been like "Eh well, it happens."


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#66 bennylava

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Posted 24 March 2018 - 04:10 AM

Another update to this thread. Part of the "what have I become" aspect of the thread. Had a realization tonight, in regards to that, when it comes to other people.

 

I can see their psychosis. Maybe psychosis is a strong word, but I can tell what is affecting them. To me this is a somewhat strange development, and I understand how it ties into people saying they are more empathic after taking mushrooms. It also reminds me of how the shaman was known as... well to some degree as the psychiatrist of the tribe. He helped people in many ways. That's a lot easier if you can see what is wrong with them. The whole thing makes me want to distance myself somewhat, from others. To avoid human contact to a certain degree. Just like a gawd damm shaman. They're often described as living out and away from the tribe. I am starting to see why. The problems of others take something of a toll on me. I am sure that many of you have noticed this as well in your dealings with people. While social anxiety was destroyed, I now have a new reason not to want to talk to people. Irony lol


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#67 Arathu

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Posted 24 March 2018 - 07:32 AM

Your avatar sums this up quite nicely IMHO...............

 

A



#68 elfstone

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Posted 27 May 2018 - 09:21 AM

This is a great thread! The Psyche is vast and deep. The narrative we create about “me” is only a story that is mostly fictional because a separate “me” does not really exist. The ego is asleep. Psyche is awake. She is always communicating through dreams, daydreams, Nature, synchronicities, Life itself, but we are shut up inside our thoughts and take them for “reality.” The images the Psyche speaks through contain the wisdom we are seeking. The mushroom activates the Psyche and quickens the healing process whereby we recover our sanity and realize who we really are. Once this happens the collective sleep of humanity becomes all too apparent. Our role in relating to this state of human affairs also grows more clear. As Terence McKenna once expressed it, “When in doubt, double the dose.”
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#69 Alder Logs

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Posted 27 May 2018 - 09:54 AM

"The discovery of truth is in the discernment of the false.
You can know what is not.

What is - you can only be."
~Nisargadatta Maharaj



#70 Guy1298

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Posted 30 May 2018 - 10:54 PM

I recall after Aya, almost everything I encountered had some strange significance, sometimes it even seemed like something was communicating through everything I saw. Grafitti of eyes, as real eyes peering into me, etc. What elfstone wrote reminded me of it. Also, the fact that not so long ago I was moving through the days with a sense of beyondness in it. Most pain was gone and my mind was quite happy. All from a simple recognition, close to what Adler says, and also playing out from that trip that made me see everything as God. I had a touch of it tonight as well. Strange world.

Doubling the dose would be interesting at this point. Mushrooms have rarely liked to impart open eyed visuals. Strange world.

Some thoughts anyway. Haha.

Edited by Guy1298, 30 May 2018 - 11:12 PM.


#71 Guy1298

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Posted 30 May 2018 - 11:05 PM

Truly, I think that reality is strange enough to never reveal itself plainly. You are all a part of it. As is everything I see. This life is a maze, constructed just as I move through it. People, are they real? I couldn't say. But, they are constructed on the fly in correspondence with everything, flawlessly revealing and secretive. Maybe hinting and pointing. But, hinting and pointing to what for whom?

#72 SteampunkScientist

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Posted 30 May 2018 - 11:11 PM

Your right and your wrong... As I can think the same thing, that you, this website, everyone on it, is being created as I perceive it.

Unless of course, my I is the same ultimate awareness that is your I, and his, and hers.... Which of course, I believe the mushroom shows us.

#73 Guy1298

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Posted 30 May 2018 - 11:22 PM

I think that's the way I see it. A universal solipsism that admits a partial reality to its varied manifestations.

Universal solipsism? :).

Edited by Guy1298, 30 May 2018 - 11:28 PM.





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