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Never again... until next time!


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#1 TheDoc

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Posted 10 June 2018 - 01:07 PM

I emailed this to a fellow shroomer, but thought I should also post it here.

 

This is roughly what I posted to him (minus a few expletives and some personally identifiable information.)

.

.

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I don't know where to start... But I'll start here...
 

I just sat bolt upright in bed, opened a 2L bottle of sparkling spring water, and emptied the full bottle over my head. I only wanted a drink, FFS!

So... I've been reminded of the events of last night, and it sounds like I really enjoyed myself. I guess I must have because all the keys on the keyboard are still melting into each other and I can see every pixel in 3D on the monitor!

I've been told the night went something like this...

At about 11:30pm we weighed out 2g for my missus and 4 for me, then we went to bed and listened to some music for a while, fully intending to just laugh our tits off and go to sleep.
Half an hour passed and I wasn't sure if I was fucked or not, so my missus suggested I go to the kitchen and get some more shrooms, as she'd read that the antidepressants I'm taking could affect the potency of the shrooms . I said 'No!', but she insisted I should, as she wanted me to be as mashed as she was.

I guess I must have already been a bit fucked, because, according to my missus, I came back into the bedroom, looking like a fucking hamster, with shrooms bulging in my cheeks and overflowing out of my mouth, and carrying another bowl with the remainder of the (dry) shrooms, which I was shoveling into my mouth faster than I could eat them.

I ate the lot. 27 fucking grams of them!
I kinda remember that bit, but everything between then and 5:30am... I was on another fucking planet. "Blitzed" doesn't even start to describe how fucked I was. I'm 'blitzed' now, 12 hours later. I don't even think there's a word to describe how fucked I was. My brain just completely melted :blush: .

It gets worse!!!... I've just come back from a massive shit (you know, the shroom-shit!) ... Fuck me, you couldn't make this up...!!!
One of the cats followed me into the toilet, waited 'til I'd dropped my trolleys and curled up in my jocks around my ankles. I just sat staring at the cat for 20 minutes, watching it morph into different shapes and colours, while I squeezed one out. Then I felt the trap-door close, and I picked up the cat and tried to wipe my arse with it...!!!!!!
Needless to say, the cat wasn't too happy with the situation, and I have a nice scar on my left bollock for my troubles... :blink:

Anyway... back to last night...

Apparently, my considerably-less-fucked other half was trying to talk to me for hours, and got nothing but totally unintelligible gibberish from me (nowt new there) until about 5:30am, when she took this video :biggrin:

 

[Direct Link]

 

A trap for young players... Stick to the weight. Don't think that because it isn't working yet that you need more! :blush: Take your normal amount and lock the rest in a safe, that nobody but a sane person has the combination to!


Edited by TheDoc, 10 June 2018 - 02:32 PM.

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#2 onediadem

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Posted 10 June 2018 - 02:04 PM

Holy shit. I haven't laughed this hard in ages. Your an animal for taking that much. Were they all dried? I hope not. Damn. I loved your laughing together. That is always the best.


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#3 sparrow95

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Posted 10 June 2018 - 02:32 PM

Thank you. :tongue:    Hilarious report!  :tongue:


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#4 TheDoc

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Posted 10 June 2018 - 02:35 PM

It was 27g of dry :blush:



#5 onediadem

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Posted 10 June 2018 - 02:38 PM

I am awarding you biggest balls so far this year. All I can say is "FUCK THAT"

 

I trip hard on 1 1/2g. My extreme dosing is 4g lol.


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#6 TheDoc

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Posted 10 June 2018 - 04:03 PM

I am awarding you biggest balls so far this year. All I can say is "FUCK THAT"

 

I trip hard on 1 1/2g. My extreme dosing is 4g lol.

I once took 15g. I have no idea why I did it but I think it was down to the whole "I don't feel fucked yet" thing.

I was beyond mashed that night, but it pales into insignificance compared to this 27g fuckwittery!

I'd like to say I'll never do this again but there's a good to fair chance I'll do something equally as stupid in the not too distant! :tinfoil:

 

I fucking love shrooms!! :biggrin:


Edited by TheDoc, 10 June 2018 - 04:03 PM.

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#7 whirledpeas

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Posted 11 June 2018 - 12:34 PM

the CAT LOL!!!!


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#8 PsyBearknot

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Posted 11 June 2018 - 02:02 PM

Wow ...really...27 grams and trying to wipe your ass with a cat (leaving all jokes...behind)

This is one for storming the gates tho
Moving post
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#9 PsyBearknot

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Posted 11 June 2018 - 02:04 PM

KIDS DO NOT TRY THIS AT HOME!

Edited by PsyBearknot, 11 June 2018 - 04:21 PM.

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#10 onediadem

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Posted 11 June 2018 - 02:49 PM

NO SHIT! (Even with a trip sitter)


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#11 jimboyia

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Posted 13 June 2018 - 05:15 AM

Wahahahaha, great Trip report Doc. What a hoot. My cats know better, though, it has to be said

#12 Soliver

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Posted 13 June 2018 - 11:52 AM

Holy sheeeeeaaahht!

 

You basically at the entire first flush of a bulk substrate ...

 

Whenever I eat more, because I've decided that 1) they're bad shrooms (never the case, as I grow them) or 2) something else I'm on is getting in the way  or 3) I shouldn't have eaten earlier - lunch is blocking my dose  or 4) 1.5 grams is a beginner's dose and I'm ready to ramp it up  or 5) I'm already shrooming but don't realize it yet ... or all of the above ...

 

I generally regret it.  At least for thirty minutes or so, then I end up redosing the same amount after a few hours.

 

Cheers!

 

:)

 

soliver



#13 Oneyedraven

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Posted 13 June 2018 - 05:15 PM

Still laughing...

#14 Alder Logs

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Posted 13 June 2018 - 08:52 PM

When I ate the bag of cubes I got from my friend, who got them from his friend, and told me that friend said it was a "shamanic dose," I did the hamster thing too, but it was more like a chipmunk thing.    I started pushing the dry cubes into my mouth and chewing.   The saliva started mixing in and they started to swell up.  I kept chewing and the wad got bigger and bigger, too big to hold in my mouth, so I just started swallowing while I continued to cram shoomage into my pie hole.   I have told the story of that "shamanic" trip several times around here over the past six years, and I hope you can find the writeup.    I will only give you the punch line again. 

 

The friend who gave them to me would not tell me who he got the "shamanic dose" from at the time, but would only say that's what his friend had called it.   I didn't see him again for a couple years, and the first thing I told him when I saw him was, "man, you were right about it being a shamanic dose!"

 

He said, "Yeah, that's what Terence called it."

 

"Terence who?"

 

I'll give you three guesses.   I didn't know he knew that Terence. 

 

So, I can't tell you how many grams it was, but only what Terence called it.   More than could fit in my big mouth.


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#15 onediadem

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Posted 13 June 2018 - 09:33 PM

Oh hell Alder, that was great! You guys and your munching whole shrooms. Has no one heard of a coffee grinder, powder and mix in oj? (Dont use hawiian punch or your trip buddies will think they are puking their guts up literally) Fuck all that chipmunk shit.


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#16 PsyBearknot

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Posted 13 June 2018 - 09:58 PM

If you all have not read Stonestare’s report about mushrooms his grandma and rob zombie I HIGHLY recommend you search it out.

I laughed my self to tears ! Here, found it

https://mycotopia.ne...ndmarob-zombie/

Thought it would fit here too
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#17 onediadem

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Posted 13 June 2018 - 10:27 PM

Thank you Bear, and thank you SS for that awesome report. My grandmother was undoubtedly the best person ever in my life. While I never tripped with her, she did trip sit me a few times when I told her I had taken a wee too much of Lucy, (Never narked me out to the fam) and I will never forget the first time she walked out of the house with a beer. I was floored, and thirty years old. Wow. I miss her terribly also.


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