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Looking for Psychedelic Therapist in UK


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#1 Cuboid

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Posted 24 October 2018 - 02:01 PM

As some here may know I have been microdosing psilocybin to help combat depression and get off of in effective antidepressant pharmaceuticals. I believe a therapeutic dose will help and feel as ready as I will ever be to do that now. I am not going deep without a guide though. I don't know anyone I would be comfortable with as a trip sitter so guess the next best thing would be to find a psychedelic friendly therapist. Don't know where to start that search though ...

#2 Alder Logs

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Posted 24 October 2018 - 02:24 PM

Could you entertain that you are not a state of mind, nor any of your thoughts?   Such identifying leads us to believe we can treat ourselves by various manipulation strategies to affect the body/mind.  

 

Who/what sees the state of depression?  Is the seeing, in and of itself, depressed?   Isn't, hasn't it always been?  Isn't it being?  

 

It is possible to view all viewing impersonally. 

 

However we might look into it, no viewer, existing as a noun, can be found.   The viewing just goes on, and the body/mind creates an idea of itself and then claims the view as secondary to its seeming to be.   But it was never so, as the viewing is, has always been, prior to identity.  

 

So, it is the body/mind identity that creates a story about how things should or shouldn't be and makes rules for its allowed states, and decides for a state of depression, or elation, depending on unreal criteria.    As the witness in the activity of viewing, as the conscious awareness that is before all the drama and constructs of mind, are we truly what is seen, depressed or other?   We can claim to be the seen as much as we like, but it doesn't make it so.  

 

Here is an invitation to be the seeing, ongoing, and just see what the depression idea is.   Is it real, or something believed into existence by an idea of something we have called, "me."    See what comes first.   That original being must be what is true.   The stories of self all are made of ideas and supposition.   The seeing is always free, when not combined with identity.


Edited by Alder Logs, 24 October 2018 - 02:27 PM.


#3 Cuboid

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Posted 24 October 2018 - 02:38 PM

Thanks for your reply Alder. I really do appreciate you ate trying to help me, and aamuch as I want to understand I don't think I do. I have read this king of thing from you many times in many threads and just when i think I get it it slips away again. I'm left thinking about that quote about Zen. "If you think you understand Zen, you don't understand Zen".

Also, I think it's important to clarify that the depression is now a minor symptom compared to a few years ago. I seem to be suffering from chronic fatigue, this affects me physically and mentally. It been burn out after burn out this last year. But, significantly I haven't gotten seriously depressed. I believe the microdosing has been an important part of that. Recent reading on the subject of mind/body links with chronic disease have resonated very strongly with me. Being emotionally blocked keeps me in a state of chronic stress response. I'm hoping a big dose of psilocybin can help unblock these emotional pathways and get me back in touch with my true self.
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#4 Alder Logs

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Posted 24 October 2018 - 03:53 PM

By all means, treat the body/mind.  Be safe in that, please. 

 

It's perfectly fine if your mind can't catch what I might try to toss your way, because it isn't aimed at identity, but an unmixed awareness.   Awareness misses nothing, for even attention arises after it, and in it.    These are only invitations to entertain in consciousness.   Something may or may not click right away.   The clicking is intended to be away from conceptual constructs.   We, as psycho-naughts, explore possibility in being.   The possibilities that open are the ones we don't exclude.   Our psychedelic therapies might be aiming for opening to exactly what is beyond what is conceived in our stories of what is.   

 

Don't worry, we are all here to get to what is, even if once glimpsed, there will be no words sufficient to convey it.


Edited by Alder Logs, 24 October 2018 - 11:49 PM.
"mixed" was supposed to be, "unmixed"


#5 Guy1298

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Posted 24 October 2018 - 11:40 PM

I recall a friend of mine. I remember I told him that my back had some deformity, scoliosis-like, which was causing a lot of tension in my neck, causing pain, etc. My friend suggested that I was "casting spells" with the word deformity. It caught me off guard. This same friend would listen to someone express deep sadness and at once tell them that everything was perfect and try to lead them to see it, but unfortunately he didn't realize that "everything being perfect" was so out of bounds that seeing for them was impossible. I think the ultimate perspective is necessarily like that. 

 

This friend of mine was really one of the best I had in the last location I lived. Sometimes he said some other things that would catch me off guard. For instance, that some person we were talking about succumbed to self-imposed "unworthiness," and he would quickly indicate that I did the same. "Unworthiness"? I think we saw things similarly. So what am I unworthy of? I suppose when I have glimpsed that say "I am God," I haven't taken it seriously in hindsight. The funny thing about "I am God" is that it isn't freedom as I would like it. In a complete God-delusion, I believed that I could do and be anything. This was a 10g trip. This was to the point where I looked at a movie and believed that I was in it or could be in it, reasonable boundaries were broken in mind, at the very least. But, the "I am God" I speak of is the sort that is free to do nothing. But, fuck, I wouldn't like that right? Haha. But, really, that is exactly what I would like and exactly what I am. 

 

Well, who knows how I started writing about that? What I was really thinking about were the issues I see in explaining or holding to the ultimate perspective with someone where it won't connect. In particular, I think this is relevant to someone that's depressed. I recall walking with a drunken distraught friend in the forest during a post-psychedelic semi-psychotic high. Here he was, he opened up, and started telling me that he felt like killing certain people, he even began telling me how he wanted to stab them with a knife, and I being higher than a kite told him that "It isn't real." It was clear to me. It wasn't clear to him.

 

Some thoughts, I sometimes think about this. 


Edited by Guy1298, 24 October 2018 - 11:44 PM.





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