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Advaita Vedanta


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#21 Guy1298

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Posted 19 November 2018 - 12:28 PM

Self-Enquiry takes me for a ride. 

 

If someone would have told me that I could get this high and a bit on the crazy-side from asking "Who am I?" Wouldn't have believed it. 

 

It makes me want to walk off the edge. Until next time. I'm taking a break.  :biggrin: .



#22 Guy1298

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Posted 19 November 2018 - 12:31 PM

I think in any spiritual practice I'd be a bit skeptical and careful. It's like the shamans in South America. They know that many westerners want to hear that they are special and can be a shaman, so that's what they tell them. Throw around the words God, dissolution, ineffable, world-shattering, and so on cleverly and someone that has tasted something like it gets bright-eyed. Can't say I really trust anyone when it comes to my spiritual insanity. Maybe one day I will. 

 

Maybe they live in different planes of existence. I can never figure it out. I don't say anything much about it. But, usually they clue me off to the fact that they're not as crystal clear as they pretend to be. Maybe they hold to a principle they've made up to preserve themselves and miss the fact of the importance of another person's existence. And I lightly smile as they do things I don't understand, configuring their fingers like a magic show to identify something magic in me. The hierarchy is created for them.

 

Who would believe that they are at the lower wrung of some super tall ladder symbolizing spiritual development. Some would. I wouldn't. It seems like a good distraction. Probably fun.


Edited by Guy1298, 19 November 2018 - 12:50 PM.


#23 Guy1298

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Posted 20 November 2018 - 12:03 AM

A bunch of nonsense. I just wasn't feeling so great today. Was caught analyzing a fellow I met in South America. 

 

I'm very judgmental, you know. But sometimes, I think people should chill out. Why are people running people over with cars? Why do they make a scene of paying double in a poor country? I don't get it. Settle down. This world is for them just as much as it is for you. If they took everything you have... you wouldn't lose anything at all. 


Edited by Guy1298, 20 November 2018 - 12:04 AM.


#24 Guy1298

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Posted 20 November 2018 - 08:49 PM

I was at work today, sitting at a table, looking at some other people. They were learning mathematics. I'm wondering about their life. Then, I'm wondering how I got here. I'm quite happy, looking at the room as if for the first time. But, when I think about why I'm here, I don't know. It feels a bit like I'm here to be a small cog in the lives of these people in front of me. They have no clue. 

 

I imagined that peace would come to me, not that I would leave and peace would remain. I imagined something world-shattering. And that which imagines it now is a great liar. I'm not even going to believe those people that worship a nondual vision of the world that say that it is world-shattering. Haha. Everyone protects themselves in the most intense ways. To protect yourself, you'll interpret all that you've found as Truth itself. I can't even trust myself... how much less can I trust anyone else? Is the problem that I haven't seen the ultimate? Or maybe the problem is the thought itself that there is "I" and an "ultimate" to see. 


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#25 Alder Logs

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Posted 20 November 2018 - 08:58 PM

I just know It ain't what I think.   I don't know is a powerful position that occupies no particular space.   Concept is but mere facsimile.   Forego that and see the seeing happening in the only piece of time we have.


Edited by Alder Logs, 20 November 2018 - 08:59 PM.

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#26 Guy1298

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Posted 07 December 2018 - 04:01 AM

Well, I've been in an out of bliss and insight a few times since I last wrote here. 

 

Well, I was working hard to do yoga to help the pain in my body. There was this issue in the left back side of my neck that wouldn't go away for weeks. Then, I sit down and do Self-Enquiry and I find that it's gone. WTF? Actually, not only is it gone, life feels a bit automatic, and there's warm pleasurable feelings in my chest. WTF? Actually, I feel more loving and feel like I'm more useful to the people around me.

 

Hmm... Not only that I'm spending the nights getting hit with the very same insights that you read in those spiritual books. Ohh... all right. This is real. By this... I mean this. Damn it. 

 

Advaita Vedanta... Damn you! Revealing the dream and presenting me with nothing that feels like everything. At the moment, I'm back down from the last bout of bliss and insight. My fault. 

 

I think the last time I fell into it I just asked "Who am I?" and I was thinking about something another friend I have said. He said that Ramana told Papaji that "What's real doesn't change?" after Papaji came to Ramana telling him he was having visions of Krishna. So, eventually, I look at the bare fact of being, not as a fact in the mind, but as total presence, and from there it's like diving into an ocean... the mind becomes silent. That which was driving me mad isn't here. This is bliss. 

 

I suppose it is the secret, no use arguing about it. It couldn't be any other way. Or could it?


Edited by Guy1298, 07 December 2018 - 09:55 AM.

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#27 Sikfreud

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Posted 20 December 2018 - 02:01 PM

How goes the journey Brother? It seems strange that when I first came here searching that none of what was in this thread made much sense to me and now it all makes perfect sense. Everything is so different now I'm a little scared. I jumped down this rabbit hole I guess I better stop fighting it. Let Go comes to mind a lot. That's the hard part. Thank you for sharing what you are going thru. I'm going to just try and go with it. Is it truth or insanity? Fuck it, fuck the Matrix.

Thanks again for all your help.
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#28 Alder Logs

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Posted 20 December 2018 - 03:43 PM

If one has the time:

 

The Avadhut Gita


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#29 Guy1298

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Posted 20 December 2018 - 07:28 PM

I've also experienced things that totally didn't make sense switch to making sense. Like magic!

 

It's felt like going insane at times for sure. But, in my opinion, if I curtail the idea that I've gone insane and rest, the fruits of this realization are bliss, happiness, love, peace, and all of that. For that reason, I'm willing to be insane, if that's what we decide to call it. :). 


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#30 Sikfreud

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Posted 21 December 2018 - 02:40 AM

Well it's been less than a month since Alder turned me on to that Rupert Spira meditation. It's been a whirl wind of Non Duality since. I think I should put the YouTube down for a few lol. Maybe let things settle and quit rushing understanding. I know... maybe I'll read a book. lmao... look Alder gave me one of those as well. But my life has truly changed I am in awe of just being. I am so very happy I'm sure I'll continue to struggle with my conditioned self But I want to continue to study this Advaita Vedanta. The Direct Path..? Non Duality.

#31 Sikfreud

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Posted 21 December 2018 - 03:20 AM

I guess it's just seeing a glimpse of my true self and seeing all my suffering for what it is. Self inflicted bull shit. Trying so hard to get somewhere when the place I have always wanted to be is right beneath the shroud of my Ego. The infinite self is so amazing. It feels like there is a small tear in the shroud and pure love seeps from it. Pure understanding. I see things differently everything has a different look and feel to it like I'm in a dream it kind of scares me am I truly changed/ changing am I going crazy? I guess like you said Guy if that's what it's called then so be it. Happiness is so very worth it.

But anyway I hope this thread is filled with a lot more discussion / sharing.

#32 Alder Logs

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Posted 21 December 2018 - 11:39 AM

One word of caution from this expression's first hand experience:   Frankly, I was pretty much blindsided by the seeing of the conditioned self after 67 years of living in, and acting as if I were my conditioned thinking.  After an initial high in the pure freedom of just being, enjoying the accompanying states, there came a tendency to identify with these states.   The states were certainly discernible in comparison to the previous living, within the confines and strictures of the old identity's personal limitations.   In this seeming new life, a natural mistake was made.   The part of the expression that had only known the habits of identification was still there to do what it habitually does: identify.   It, that part, took the high states of being as to be it, the new improved person.  

 

I can only call it grace that it was then that I found several masters in videos online, and as is said, things that might have made no sense before now had a place to resonate, i.e., Advaita Vedanta, or things like that.   In part because of the seeing past my stories and thereby, seeing the absolute oneness of it all, finding voices describing that seeing and ways it might happen, I was more ready and willing to fill my time taking it in.    In that time, in those environments, I was able to see that I had begun building a new identity based on elevated states, as they appeared to my senses.   In my case, for a short time, it nearly rose to what might be called a messianic complex.   I could see how that brand of craziness comes into being.   I needed a guide, and for me, Mooji filled the bill.   That's just for me, but my nod goes to him only because that's how it worked out.   How it can work out for anyone else will be their path.

 

The warning I have is just to see the states of being from and as unidentified seeing.   They are, like everything else seen and experienced, just passing as clouds in a clear sky.   The states will be seen and their contrast to what came before and what continues to come and go will be what causes them to be noticeable.   The landscape of the states will continue to change, and in time, the WOW of it gone.   Peace isn't always that exciting.  If there is a desire for WOW states, who would that be?  What would that be?  

 

If there seems to be an 'I' that has states, look closely at that I.  Keep looking, as the seeing, seeing that identity tries to come to it, and it does not need to be anything but its pure Self.   Discernment grows, and we more and more see what is false, leaving only what is real.


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#33 Sikfreud

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Posted 21 December 2018 - 12:10 PM

That would be my Ego self desiring that which is not Present. That would be that which is not Truth.

Thank You

I'm sorry that was a response to the questions above I feel I may come across in a manner not intended.

Thank you for your words of wisdom.

Edited by Sikfreud, 21 December 2018 - 02:16 PM.


#34 Sikfreud

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Posted 21 December 2018 - 12:23 PM

The last Paul Hedderman video I listened to he was talking about how he would go in so deep trying so hard meditating the longest and feeding off the praise of others trapping himself in what he was trying to escape.

Edited by Sikfreud, 21 December 2018 - 12:27 PM.





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