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#181 OldAndMiserable

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Posted 24 February 2019 - 10:49 PM

So veils are tearing on some of them! Should I pluck them, or let them go for now?

 

20190224_224024.jpg

 

There's a couple that are like this... may leave them till the morning and pluck a bunch.

 

 

However... the other cake...

 

20190224_224203.jpg

 

The one fruit has a dark spot on the cap... should I be worried?  It has a few other pins developing (finally...)



#182 OldAndMiserable

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Posted 25 February 2019 - 07:02 AM

Picked a few! Not as big as the first, but just as beautiful!!!

 

20190225_064737.jpg

 

And immediately did this!

 

20190225_065544.jpg


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#183 Kola

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Posted 25 February 2019 - 07:09 AM

Awesome pics! I'm sharing your excitement and joy as we speak, while I wait for mine to do this! :) I'm living and loving through your success and everything's perfect! So glad to see your progressing so well, you should have enough for whatever kind of dose you want to experiment with now! I'm stoked for you! Keep us updated, I love pictures of mushies! :) :) whenever you decide to take your first dose make sure to fill us in. I'm thrilled to se how it goes!! Happy growing and good day to you!

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#184 OldAndMiserable

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Posted 25 February 2019 - 10:21 AM

So some of the 'fruits' of my labor have dried, totalling...

 

20190225_101344.jpg

 

I'm slowly realizing that 5 dried grams is a heck of a lot!!! But you are right, Kola, I do have a lot to experiment with! I'll most likely start with no more than this amount... as ready as I feel, there's still that little voice in me that says I need to wait. 

 

Will I ever be ready? I know set and setting are key, and I need to be 100% ready to commit, cuz there will be no turning back... but the more I think about doing it, I chicken out...



#185 SteampunkScientist

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Posted 25 February 2019 - 10:36 AM

All change to our lives takes risk.

 

Are you afraid you wont be the same person after you take 5 grams with the proper mind-set?

 

Let me set your mind at ease there: No.  No you wont be the same person, but then, you are not the same person today as you were yesterday.

 

The change will be bigger than just living another day however, that I can pretty much guarantee.  But you have come this far, so ask yourself:  "Am I ready to chuck it all and throw out my work here, leave the forum and any thought of using these sacraments ( and that is what they truly are)?"  I suspect your answer to that question is no.


Edited by SteampunkScientist, 25 February 2019 - 10:37 AM.

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#186 Kola

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Posted 25 February 2019 - 12:55 PM

This thread keeps getting better cause I'm close to the same position, I will go off how I plan to do it I guess and I hope it helps! I am extremely familiar with prescribed medication, specifically the controls ones, after many years of use it really negatively impacted me and I have a hard time trying to find joy or have fun, it did a lot of damage to my psyche I think, the last several years I've been struggling to find purpose and meaning. My mindset and goals are off from who I want to be and who I strive to be, and I feel like I'm to young to be in this position, really no age should be, im trying to keep it short , but that's the main reason I'm getting into this. I have done a lot of research and read books on the positive and negative, and come to the conclusion that this *might*help. Honestly idk but I feel out of options. Regardless of that though I am unsure of dose aswell, I won't have a sitter and will be home alone so the 5g is out of the question for me to due paralyzing fear of the simplely going to that place and not being able to get back, irrational I know. I've narrowed it down to between 2- 3.5g. I am going to get off work, at 2pm have a nice workout, do some yoga(which I never do) have a nice healthy balanced meal, try to pray ( not go god, I dont think, but to something?) And about 6 hours after that meal I'm going to eat my mushies, as terrence mckenna did, I'm just gonna sit down and talk to them as I eat them and ask them to please be nice to me, and please dont hurt me (listening to Mckenna has been a huge help) and whatever else comes to mind. I'm gonna try not to ask for anything specific. I feel like for myself, I always have to be in control and know whats happening and going to happen and It scares me that if I don't take enough I am going to end up in a trip hanging on the edge of anxiety. And if I take to much, well thats listed above. Lol. I am super nervous and I have the same feeling of when I get excited my mind, that seems to be locked in a prism, trys to step back and question if I want to do this or not. If I should or not. But I'm going to do it. Gonna try to do no less then 2g and no more then 3.5, but that's subject to change until my mushies are ready. Hopefully only 2 more weeks and I will have enough to get where I'm going. From everything I've read and my 1 experience I did have, I do think im just over thinking these things, sounds like you might be to. I dont feel like the mushrooms are out to hurt me, I believe it's the exact opposite really. But I am scared of change and I think that is what these mushrooms will do. My body, my mind, every fiber of my being wants to stay here xause its safe, and change is hard, but I am steadily trying to remind myself that its just a type of survival instinct, fear is the unknown is natural and thats exactly what this is to me. Idk how it will all turn out for me but all I can do is hope for the best. I'm really excited to see how these next few weeks play out for you and for myself. Any updates or replies are greatly appreciated. Reading this thread and many others have been my main source of inspiration and hope recently. Keep em coming! :) sorry for the long drawn out thread, I dont open up much. Hope to hear how everything goes soon! :)

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#187 OldAndMiserable

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Posted 25 February 2019 - 01:07 PM

Thanks for the comments, everyone :) Kola, you sound a lot like me!

 

It's not the change on a spiritual/metaphysical level that scares me (tho, to be honest, it does a bit but in a good way :P)

 

It's the fact that I don't know how these things will affect me physically/mentally. For the past 5 years, I have lived a fearful life, unable to take part in things I once loved because I didn't know how I would handle it; the diagnosis of Borderline Personality Disorder mixed with daily anxiety attacks made for a scary day to day lifestyle. I have avoided so much so that I could remain in control of myself, and despite my huge progress and growth through this time, I know there is much more I can do/learn, and with the help of these sacred healers, I can achieve all that and more.

 

The fact that I have learned so much about the mushroom, mostly from here as well as many other sources, makes me realize how important it is for me to use them, but it's the thought of ingesting something that changes the way I feel to something I am not used to that makes me second-guess myself and worry about it. I have used marijuana for years, since my early teens (about 25 years ago), and so I had no qualms about picking it up as a helper through the tough times. I knew how it would make me feel and I could easily gauge what steps to take to make for a safe journey through the day. 

 

Mushrooms is something I have no experience with. Besides trip reports and the like on the internet, and all the lab tests and patient's testimonials, I know next to nothing about what physical symptoms to expect or how it will affect me mentally. I have heard a lot of both sides of the subject, good and bad, and I can't help but hesitate...

 

I know that a small dose of .5g to 1g(my ideal starting point) is not going to rewrite the fabric of my being, so I do feel safer in that sense... but what symptoms can I expect? Marijuana makes me light-headed and relaxed, giggly and hungry (Tho I have used it so much now that I feel it's more a placebo effect, and sometimes it seems to trigger attacks... I'm hoping to get help from the mushroom for it, tho that may take a larger dose than I am prepared for) 

 

Kola, I am so happy to hear that this site and thread has helped you! I come here daily, sometimes just to re-read things :P but I always feel better learning all I can from the experts here! 


Edited by OldAndMiserable, 25 February 2019 - 01:07 PM.


#188 SteampunkScientist

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Posted 25 February 2019 - 01:16 PM

I'm not going to tell you that taking these sacraments will suddenly give you hope and a burning desire for your purpose, and clear vision as to what that purpose should be.  There are people who claim that this happened to them, and that is awesome, but that was not my experience, and I am fairly certain there are plenty here who will back that up as well.

 

But, they may very well show you what you could be by showing you the options, or showing you the infinite paths you could take, or demonstrating for you that "desire" comes after choice, rather than the other way around as so many (myself included) have gotten backwards so many many times... 

 

They will take you out of your safe zone - by showing you that there is no such thing.  Let me quote  the smartest person in the universe, Rick Sanchez here:

 

"Am I Evil?"

"Worse, your smart. When you know nothing matters, the universe is yours. And I've never known a universe that was into it. The universe is basically an animal that grazes on the ordinary. It creates infinite idiots just to eat them. Smart people climb on top and take reality for a ride, but it will never stop trying to throw you, and eventually it will.  There is no other way off."

 

The sacraments will reveal things like that to you - but then will also reveal that you, as part of reality, need not take Rick's narcissistic existential point of view - that you are free to create your own.  In other words they show you that you are the "god" you are looking for, and that meaning does not already exist per'se but that you are the one who creates the meaning you desire.

 

Then they leave you to make your own choice.  At least that has been my experience in this particular universe.

 

Which, of course means it could be totally different for you.


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#189 Kola

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Posted 25 February 2019 - 03:25 PM

Yea man being on these forums have kept me out of my head quite a bit, which is good. I enjoy coming on here and reading. It takes me somewhere my mind isnt. And steampunk, you put that perfectly and thats exactly what I'm striving for, choice if you will, and/or a different perspective of myself and the things around me. I do believe I'm in the right place. :)

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#190 OldAndMiserable

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Posted 26 February 2019 - 01:53 PM

Ok, so here is what I have chosen to get for this hobby!

 

Dehydrator:

https://www.amazon.c...,aps,174&sr=8-1

 

Pressure Cooker:

https://www.amazon.c...ooks,167&sr=1-1

 

Any thoughts/opinions?


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#191 OldAndMiserable

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Posted 26 February 2019 - 02:47 PM

Also, I'm going to be retrieving my cakes from their second bath in a couple of hours. I remember the Masses pdf said to put verm on the cakes after the first bath, and it wasn't necessary for the others. While I was tidying up around the mancave, I came across a jar that had a bit of brown rice flour I had left over from the start of this grow. Could I roll the cakes in that, to add more food for the fruits?



#192 WalkingCatfish

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Posted 26 February 2019 - 03:27 PM

 I came across a jar that had a bit of brown rice flour I had left over from the start of this grow. Could I roll the cakes in that, to add more food for the fruits?

Nope. That rice flour would be "food" for mold long before the mycelium ever get to it.


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#193 WalkingCatfish

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Posted 26 February 2019 - 03:30 PM

Ok, so here is what I have chosen to get for this hobby!

 

Dehydrator:

https://www.amazon.c...,aps,174&sr=8-1

 

Pressure Cooker:

https://www.amazon.c...ooks,167&sr=1-1

 

Any thoughts/opinions?

The Presto is reliable and roomy, and that's a fair price (I paid more for mine, from a local store).  I don't know that brand of dehydrator, so can't comment. I bought the Hamilton-Beach, and like it a lot...it's quite a bit cheaper, too ($71 CAN).


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#194 OldAndMiserable

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Posted 26 February 2019 - 08:16 PM

Thanks for the help! I didn't add the brf to the cakes, and just put them back in the chamber as they were. The cake that hasn't produced a lot has started to show a few more pins, so that's promising! It may wind up lasting longer than the other due to it's slow progress... maybe? :p

#195 OldAndMiserable

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Posted 27 February 2019 - 11:47 PM

So I noticed the new guys on one of the cakes have a bit of a discoloration... The pins were present at the time of the dunk, so maybe they got too wet?  

 

20190227_133714.jpg

 

Should I be concerned?



#196 roc

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Posted 28 February 2019 - 06:47 AM

Probably was the dunk with pins already on the cake.

 

I'd go ahead and pick them now and be sure and knock off all the little abortions.

They are fine to dry and consume.

I usually eat the aborts myself and don't kid yourself they are potent.


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#197 OldAndMiserable

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Posted 28 February 2019 - 11:54 AM

I plucked the tiny guys from the cake... LOOK!!! AWWW!!!!!!! 

 

20190228_095108.jpg

 

Also, I got all the mushrooms I have recently dried together with the small bunch from the last dry, and found this...

 

20190228_095440.jpg

 

How do people eat 30+ grams of these things in one sitting???? 

 

 

 

All of the comments from everyone here have been so amazing! When it comes to helping me overcome my fears concerning these amazing things, you have all been so wonderful with your kind words, and I can't thank you enough! I have been giving this a lot of thought, and I have finally decided to wait until after March 13th. On the 13th, I have an appointment to do something known as Past Life Regression Hypnosis, where I will be exploring times in my childhood as well as times from past versions of myself to help unlock and uncover parts about me that have shaped who I have become, and to use that knowledge to work out this incarnation of me and make life amazing.

 

Because I will be in a deep state of hypnosis, I will be accessing my subconscious, the true self, to find the help I need. I was also told I could make up a list of questions that I would like answers to, and one of them was about the use of psychedelics... I mean, I could always eat the amount I have now and find some answers today, but I still can't help but feel nervous about them, so I want to take these next few days to think things over, meditate on them, and see what comes from that. Based on everything I have learned about everything mushroom-related, and combined with everything I know about the universe, spirituality, existence in general and all the other stuff I have learned about in the past 5 years of seeking, I can't help but feel that this is the logical next step!!!

 

I just want to be sure.


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#198 OldAndMiserable

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Posted 01 March 2019 - 02:09 PM

The cake that had the cute fruits on it seems to be done producing; while the other is showing a few new growths, the the first is just sitting there. Since it's a lump of mycelium, I'm assuming it can inoculate other (properly prepared) food sources, could I break it up and put it into new jars to begin the process anew?

#199 Deleena24

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Posted 01 March 2019 - 02:16 PM

The cake that had the cute fruits on it seems to be done producing; while the other is showing a few new growths, the the first is just sitting there. Since it's a lump of mycelium, I'm assuming it can inoculate other (properly prepared) food sources, could I break it up and put it into new jars to begin the process anew?


I would not recommend it. Since its flushed a few times already its guaranteed to be covered in competitive molds and bacteria. Trying to innoculate any sterile grain or substrate would result in contamination, without a doubt.

You can put some to agar and clean it up through transfers to preserve the strain, or maybe even spawn it to some bulk, but G2G, or cake to grain in this case, would he a waste of time and resources IMHO.
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#200 SteampunkScientist

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Posted 02 March 2019 - 07:18 AM

I concur with Deleena, I've tried this a few times, also using old cakes to spawn tubs, and the results have always been disappointing, usually a nice tub of trich.
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