I'd like to start by saying during the grow 3 little mush came up that I picked. The tops were lighter colored than the others. I washed then ate them expecting nothing really considering dried would have been less than a gram. Well about 40 minutes later I felt something which surprised me. This led me to eat 37.5 grams fresh after harvesting the rest which I expected to be plenty after having a sensation with such a small amount, but I was wrong. There were some mild visuals which were cool, but it wasn't what I was looking to experience. I wanted some answers, some wisdom.
So I'm sitting on my sofa surfing the net in the afternoon and have the notion to just make some mush tea after seeing Wharfs post. I thought well the 37.5 fresh really didn't get me anywhere, so lets do 8g dried. As I was making the tea something said "You know ya might as well just go for it" so I put in 12g dried. I steeped it for around 3 hours adding water as needed. I then took the mush and put it in cloth squeezing it dry into my cup. I retreated back to my sofa and began my sipping. After finishing half of it I thought "Maybe I should stop and wait a bit", being me that went out the window and I downed it all. I got up to make some green tea after a bit. On my way back to the couch I heard "remember you asked for this". Had no idea what that meant at the time.
It started with fractals, so many fractals. The vibe was outrageously intense. Walking was out of the question. Speaking took effort. I experienced cold, heat, unlove, love, fear, oneness that all is right in the universe and finally the greatest feeling of gratitude I've ever felt in my life. Many tears. I can't put it all into words right now and don't know if I ever will. I did type out a couple things:
First you have to let go and let god
second you have to let go and let god
and finally third Wimzers(my name) - You have to let go and let GOD
Last bit was -- You must feel unloved before you feel loved
I do remember my hands shaking while typing.
I have no intention of going through that again anytime soon lol. Holy crap. I'm a bit off today. Feel vulnerable and spent. Time to chill.