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My trip


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#21 Wimzers

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Posted 01 April 2020 - 10:09 AM

I LOVED that. These type of OMFG kinda trips are what I love seeing in here. It might take a while to process all of it and I find these kind of deep trips to have profound effects on my way of thinking for a long time. Thanks for sharing!

 

Thank you Coopdog. Crazy ride that left me exhausted. 
 

 

Fear is natural, since we've depended on an illusion, until that illusion is shown through. When I did something similar to what you did I was left with about a year of fear to deal with. It led me to many things I wouldn't have found otherwise. Meditation, loving-kindness... so on, so on, so on. I'm very grateful. 

 

The illusion was shattered which I'm thankful for experiencing. Do the things you learned help prevent the illusion from returning?
 

 

First off, if I read correctly, you ate 3.75 grams (comparatively) and decided, "Weak! Lets more than double it. Fuck that. Triple it!"? Bold move, sir (I presume, sir).

Holy moly, sir. Tomes have been written on this.

 

 

 

Fear of losing your ego, your "self", dying, that you're never going to be sane again, were you ever sane in the first place?, that you took too much-too much, impermanence (may be getting redundant with some of these), the realization you don't know shit, of the man coming to get you for your "illegal" act, the realization that you're not that cool, that you got lots to work on for people to think you're cool, maybe I shoulda chose her instead, why did I try that?, you've been kind of an asshole, that you haven't fulfilled your bucket list, that bucket lists are a little bit stupid, should've gone to trade school, of the CIA coming to get you?, is this person I ate all this LSD with in the CIA? (ok, probably half those may just be me, but...you get the point).

 

Yes, I wanted something mind blowing and I wasn't let down. I don't think I'll ever forget hearing "remember you asked for this". Totally bizarre. 
 
You hit on it. Insanity and questioning sanity followed by dying and those that I care about watching me die without caring. 
 
One thing I learned about this experience is I don't know shit.
 
As long as there is attachment to things that are
unstable, unreliable, changing and impermanent,
there will be suffering –
when they change, when they cease to be
what we want them to be.
(...)
If craving is the cause of suffering, then the cessation
of suffering will surely follow from 'the complete
fading away and ceasing of that very craving':
its abandoning, relinquishing, releasing, letting go. (Wiki)
 
Impermanence has started coming into my life gradually after the trip. I've thought about it in the past, but not like this. It's more real. If that makes sense which to ya'll I know it does. 

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#22 Guy1298

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Posted 01 April 2020 - 08:19 PM

The illusion was never shattered for me. It's ever-present. But, I know it's an illusion! :biggrin:



#23 Wimzers

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Posted 01 April 2020 - 10:09 PM

The illusion was never shattered for me. It's ever-present. But, I know it's an illusion! :biggrin:

 

At the end of my trip the words Just Be kept coming out of my mouth. I went outside to see the stars and it was AMAZING. I was in awe and with no thoughts for a short time. I went back outside tonight to look at the stars and while they are beautiful it sure doesn't compare to the brightness of that night. Plus I was thinking the whole time about the beauty instead of just being. So now I find myself saying Just Be throughout the day when it comes to mind. I've also found myself watching more of Mooji. I'm able to bring attention to myself. I don't understand what it means to go deeper into myself? 


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#24 ElPirana

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Posted 09 April 2020 - 01:59 PM

Ju

The illusion was never shattered for me. It's ever-present. But, I know it's an illusion! :biggrin:

 
At the end of my trip the words Just Be kept coming out of my mouth. I went outside to see the stars and it was AMAZING. I was in awe and with no thoughts for a short time. I went back outside tonight to look at the stars and while they are beautiful it sure doesn't compare to the brightness of that night. Plus I was thinking the whole time about the beauty instead of just being. So now I find myself saying Just Be throughout the day when it comes to mind. I've also found myself watching more of Mooji. I'm able to bring attention to myself. I don't understand what it means to go deeper into myself?
Don’t worry about what it means to go deeper into yourself. As you move the focus of your awareness inward more and more often, you will find it will reveal itself to you. It does this in its own time. Sometimes you may find you will see/feel things differently, with more quality to the experience.
Lately I have found many times when the experience no longer feels like something outside myself, rather the experience feels like it is me (which it really is!!) and by this I even include the apparent outward perceptions, like visually seeing that tree, or audibly hearing that insect. Your whole life has been a process of creating separateness, as you peel the layers of that perception away, what remains is you.
Just be with yourself. Notice how each moment feels inwardly. You can begin the self inquiry by literally asking yourself “who am I who is experiencing...” but the words are only necessary to learn how to point yourself inward.
The lessons you learn in your trips can be used as guides.
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#25 Alder Logs

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Posted 09 April 2020 - 03:14 PM

The big questions at the heart of the "inquiry," if seemingly answered, going further, we can watch and see if any of these answers ever remain static.   I like to say to just "hold the questions" and let them be, as we go on in the continuing present, just being.  Just being is not a state, but where all the changing states appear and fade.  Here and now is a wondrous experience in its most raw form.  It's never not here, never not now.


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