Couldn't find any trip-reporting section, so posting here.
This was my third ceremony, and the first two experiences were absolutely awesome. Lifechanging.
This one was cool too, if you don't count one highly disturbing event. You see, there was a rule...
You know how these new age shamans like mixing different plants and bag crumbs of all kinds of traditions into one ceremony? Well, here's what we did medicine-wise: we had some rape at first (tobacco snuff), then some tobacco tea (which you have to suck into your nostrils), then we ate some San Pedro, then we drank some San Pedro + mushroom tea, then another round of tobacco tea, some more San Pedro, then another round of mushroom tea, then some sweet wine (to improve our relationship with alcohol spirit), and yeah, as a little bonus we finished with a chocolate candy with "Santa Maria" oil which hit us really hard in the morning. Oh, and the last thing was a ritual cup of water at the sunrise.
So, the rule. The rule was that everyone should stay in the circle. We were allowed to go to the toilet unless somebody was singing with that fancy peyote drum or some medicine was being served. Basically, the last three hours of the ceremony consisted of various rituals going one by one, and nobody was allowed to leave.
And that's exactly when that mushroom tea filled my tank. And I had to hold for about three hours coz I felt like a good boy and wanted to respect the rules. Three hours of suffering and biting my fists. And as I said the last thing was the water. "Please don't go until everybody drink water". Well, there were at least 60 of us in the circle and the water guy was going one by one serving water and hugging people while I was dying there. And drinking water myself in that situation was like "r u kidding me???"
Well, eventually I rushed to the toilet, pulled down my pants and... I could find it! I HAD NO DICK, just some soft skin where it was supposed to be, were it used to me my whole life. Turns out if you hold too long or too strong it can shrink like that or hide in your belly or I don't know how it works. This never happened to me before, I didn't even know it was possible! So, while I was figuring whether it's permanent or whether I'm just too high and hallucinating, I managed to relax and it finally showed up.
I had my moment of freedom, not too satisfactory though, because my knees were shaking and I kept feeling I still need to pee afterwards. All's fine now, but I had some strong concerns about my health then.
Then the candy hit us and I really didn't get to feel that awesome San Pedro presence I was actually after (besides my declared ceremonial intentions ofc).
All in all, it's been a great night and a great day after, but yeah. Now I doubt I will ever do that again. Homemade trips seem safer and cozier now.
Edited by Telumehtar, 30 July 2019 - 01:53 AM.