It wouldn’t be a crisis either way. But I’m sure you can understand that is another major level of not feeling I belong where I am currently at.
Just remember that the majority is not always correct. In my latter years of being in the military I went through some major surgeries. About six months in I noticed myself changing and I pushed myself away from the medicine they were shoving down my throat. However, it did not take but three years for me to become a severe alcoholic. I just kept telling myself it was better than the opiates. Yet it was starting to affect my work, and social life. I denied the alcoholism for a long time because it was the normal culture for our unit. We drank so much together, and at functions. It took me waking up in a bathtub hardly able to walk out the bathroom because of all the cans/bottles that I realized I had a major problem.
All the briefings, and power points. All the constant military counseling on alcohol abuse, and they never covered stopping. They only covered prevention. Like abstinence it hardly ever works, and it misses so much more of the education. That morning I decided to quit cold turkey, and I woke up that night in sweats, vomiting, and having convulsions. I called a family member, and she informed me that one could die. Just stopping like that. For three days I sipped on some whiskey, and slowly weaned myself off.
When I was two weeks clean I joined an alcoholics, and addicts community. I stayed for one year, and I will briefly discuss the insight that may be unique to me but it may help others. One things they constantly stated was once an addict always an addict. I seemed to cringe the first time I heard it, and the feeling grew each and every time it was shared. Blatantly ignoring that some people can change was to me, completely ignorant.
For me it was very simple, and years later psychedelics would shed light on something I found out on my own. Many times we lie to ourselves. We push things to the side, and we make excuses for ourselves. That is when the individual has lost mental strength. We know what is best yet we completely ignore it. I found that months after drinking, months after I removed that poison from my mentality that I had recovered that mental strength. I could watch others drink, I could see it on TV, and I could look the other way. I still stayed in the program, and went an entire year without drinking. I told myself after a year I would have a drink. That I had beaten that demon, and could congratulate myself. I went past that anniversary date, and did not even think about drinking. I was yet again coming up with an excuse, and trying to make my reason for drinking righteous.
About three years sober, and out of the military. I was out with some friends, and I had a drink. I thought nothing of it, and I still dont. I am a intelligent individual who saw the error of my ways. Once enlightened to the condition that I grew I realized it was okay to drink. I had the mental strength, and I could see what I was blind to for so long that I would never let it happen again. I still hardly ever drink but I cannot put myself on the construct that if I have a beer at a BBQ that I am some how less of a person, or relapsing. To me its a weaker construct to think that one has to stay away from alcohol if once an alcoholic. Like you have never learned from your mistakes. It shows strength that I can indulge without falling down the rabbit hole again.
I completely understand where you are coming from. The drinking culture seamless flows from the military world to the civilian defense sector because its mostly ex-military.