Posted 14 January 2020 - 06:06 PM
I guess my daughter thought that where she was going was affordable and her biological father is there. Unfortunately, her father has severed all ties with her there since. And shes experiencing terrible anxiety and panic attacks.
As for me, i am my mother's caretaker and have errands that take me out of the house pretty much every day. I just mean being social. I dont go out & party. I dont see friends. I just live here with my awesome man and my crazy mother. She yelled at me today because they put ice in her drink at wendys. I apparently make her "beg for cold drinks and why wont" i "put" her "in a home yet?". Gotta laugh at life. If you dont it makes things crappy.
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Posted 14 January 2020 - 07:53 PM
Why don't she come back to live with you?
Yea i live with crazy granny cursing at me and everything all the time it's getting on my nerves but as you say you just need to laugh at that haha
I found video on youtube of guy who was talking for years how psychedelics are good and now he says he wont do them never again. but he was using all psychedelics on earth that can be found I think and always high high doses
I've never had bad trip on shrooms but didn't go over 2.5 and my question is can you go nuts like him if you just stick to mushrooms? Like little doses 1-2 g for recreational fun... I've tried LSD 2 times and didn't like it so I just stick to shrooms.
Can shrooms fuck you up like ayahuasca or dmt or mescaline and that kind of stuff?
Posted 17 January 2020 - 12:51 PM
I've just smoked some CBD cheese weed and it helped with anxiety just a tip for all you anxiety people :)
Posted 17 January 2020 - 01:26 PM
Im just checking leafly.com for lineage and noticing that us and uk have two different cheese strains but are of the exact same parents Afghani and Colombian gold....
I wonder what the difference (if any) is.
Oh the daughter has a hard on for being "an adult" and hates failing. She points the finger at me quite often but fails to see her part in the cause of the situation or problem.
I had better things to worry about when I was raising her alone, with minimal child support from her father ($30 a week). Things like making sure we dont have to spend the cold winter in my car, or ya know "luxuries" like food and electricity.
Her side is probably on point bc after working 3 jobs i had no time or energy to spend with her.
Yet bc of where she is, she cant see the forest through the trees and outwardly blames otherz(me, not her abandoning sperm donor)
My mother has a neurological disorder, Huntington's disease. I was hoping my daughter would stick around to help. But unfortunately she just thinks i want to push off my moms care onto my her and leave. Which sure would be fun but not my plan. Her father had reached out to me and told me shes saying im hoarding houses. I own my moms house in the south and rent it out to pay for my home i live in. She wants me to give her the house i rent for free. Which if you arent helping with crazy grandma. Then what makes you think you get things for not working for them? Maybe she thinks shez got an in with the Royal family, idk?
I took ownership of the house so the government cant take it from my mom bc she will eventually need to be in a care facility and does not have enough money to do so. So the government allows me to take ownership and after 5 years i can apply for help for my mom. But it cant be before 5 years or they will take the housefor payment of the care she receives. Loopholes in the law..
My mom and her siblings did that with their mother and thats how (trickle down) i own my rental. And thats why the kids mad at me.. Partially... I mean im quite sure that as a 17 y/o mom i didnt do (anything) everything correctly..... But i did my best. Might have not been "The Best" but it was all i had.
Posted 18 January 2020 - 04:01 PM
Don't beat yourself up on how you might have not raised your kid well enough when you were so young - it's not why she is acting like that even though she might think that. My mother was just 18 when she got me and wasn't the perfect mom either, but did what she could. In theory I have missed very much in my upbringing, like a father, but that wasn't something my mother was able to give me in raising me - the lessons a good father would have been able to give. Whatever you have done you have done all you could at the time. No matter what you might have done differently your kid would probably end up the same. Most of a kid's development comes from outside influences, like school, family, friends and other people they take on as a role model.. Parents have much less influence than they give themselves credit for.
I can imagine a work ethic might be something a good father can teach a kid, but I'm not sure if that would have made a difference either - at least not in my case - things might have not been that different because I took those lessons I was able to accept/internalize from somewhere else in stead. A kid is going to be who he or she is going to be 50/50 on genetics/upbringing - and the influence of a mother or father is just a small percentage of that 50 percent in upbringing.
I just wanted to share my view on that.
Kids can be very stubborn and short sighted at some times. My brother had a phase where he wanted to give in very little when helping out my mom at home because he felt like he was grown up and independent, but at the same time claimed he had the right to get everything for free and my mother would have to just take care of him and buy everything he wanted.
He wanted independence but at the same time my mother was a bit overbearing about him going out at night and stuff (that's why he was still demanding to be taken care of), and that worked counterproductively. As soon as I noticed that and told my mother, she gradually stopped being so controlling and just let him go his way without worry - but also got very serious when it came to him being difficult, sometimes breaking stuff in the house because he was pissed, and made him pay for that stuff quite literally.. I think that freedom but at the same time demanding more responsibility from him helped him go his own way a little bit and now things are better because he feels more independent and is able to develop that side of him.
My mother was never very overbearing in bringing me up, she was mostly busy with my little brother, I had a lot of freedom. I also never got it in my head that I should expect anything from my mother like that so I would have to just figure stuff out myself.
It can be a pain in the ass but hopefully it will pass when she is able to see things for what they are. If she wants to be so grown up, you can treat her that way. I think you are doing that by trying to make her see that not everything comes for free anymore. It can take a while before that will sink in. Stubborn kids.
Edited by RutgerHauer, 18 January 2020 - 04:30 PM.
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Posted 18 January 2020 - 05:19 PM
I dont feel i failed. Shes living. Self sufficient. It's not that i think she cant, i just wonder why. Work and help here while saving money to buy a house or just be here to help till we leave. this house was bought as a retirement investment, it could be self sustainable with extra income. Its a good bonus but we specifically moved here bc She was throwing a thrombo about having to move out of state and it was near the college she was supposed to be attendingz which would have ceased the college loans i have from her attending (ahem, dropping out of) the culinary Institute of America, collecting intrest and making her crapbag father have to pay child support till shes 24.which would cover her phone bill that i pay for.
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