Book by Richard Tarnas
I can't remember what I've actually put up on this board (I write some big posts, get uncomfortable with what I'm sharing and delete - I know, I'm working on it), but I've spent most of my life as a hard(er) edged scientist, physicist and engineer. I've been quite successful in my career and thought I'd figured everything out, but definitely felt like I've been missing some pieces. Lately my personal hobby that dates back to childhood depending on how you look at it, has lead me on a crazy journey that has fundamentally changed me.
As a kid, I went to Catholic school, run by nuns. I wasn't a great kid, i'd break into the science lab or the library. I'd take books on Atlantis and the Loch Ness Monster, and I'd look at jarred fetuses, play with mercury etc.
As an adult, I've given up on Atlantis and all of that "what if" type exercises- there was a marked time in my life I decided it was bullshit and that fantastic things can't exist (sad day, in retrospect). I still do some weird things with science although I admit I wish I understood how to grow some plants better.
Anyway, I think my first period of enlightenment was around the 6th grade. I saw The Burbs with Tom Hanks and that chanting really freaked me out. I was in church and we were chanting or reciting a prayer and I realized that I was indoctrinated into an ideology without choice and I don't even know which other ones are out there and how they differ (not a dig on any religion, I just didn't understand or agree with my part in it at the time). I took a strong turn to a type of atheism, but in times of despair I'd still consider a god. I found this really interesting, but decided it was a primitive expression of thought from a simple part of my brain that hadn't evolved properly yet.
I know - those words...
Sometime in my comfortable adulthood, I eased up a bit. I decided that my god was Gaia - I actually don't know a lot about Gaia, I haven't sought out information, but I decided that my planet was my god, nature was my god - a force infinitely larger than me that had the ability to let me flourish or wipe me out like squashing a bug. I was, an continue to be grateful, I try to both honor and care for the planet and I'm amazed at its beauty and history and it's place in the cosmos. The words here are just to describe the discrepancy of size, my god at this state wasn't vengeful or mean-spirited, just all encompassing.
So a few months ago, I listened to a radio interview with Graham Hancock. This guy is not a scientist, he's a journalist that dives deep into archeological record, points out discrepancies and dissonance between scientific communities and extrapolates really interesting information. If archeologists are right about X, that means Geologists are wrong about Y which means Z. And vice versa with some interesting implications for our history. Hancock's main theme is that there was a precursor civlization to what we know that left "fingerprints" across history which are responsible for very similar developments throughout the history of civilization through groups of people who were separated both chronologically and geographically.
I encourage everyone to check out his books. I've read several of them myself, I love them even when he gets out there sometimes.
The main thing about Hancock is that I approached his work with childlike wonder and an open mind that I'm not sure I would have been able to do without breaking into the library when I was a kid to read about Atlantis. I opened my mind to what makes a civilization advanced and how advanced we are relatively. I discovered a lot of ideas that I'm still reading into including how the cosmos acts on us. If we're connected to the cosmos and the positions of the heavenly bodies has some type of relation to what happens on our small chunk of the universe, then we're actually connected to each other and everything around us.
Hancock brought me to Tarnas - a professor who dove into Astrology to understand it and was startled by what he learned and how accurate the concepts are throughout history. This book is kind of an intellectual struggle for me, the concepts are deep and they're taking me a while to unpack and justify with my understanding of the world, but the concept is growing. We're all connected.
And if that's the case, then what is time and space? I believe it has to be connected too. By that I mean, we look at time as affected by gravity, but in some ways, we're still considering it to be linear. It seems to me that it's cyclical and bent back on itself.
I struggle for the words to describe some of my thoughts. With what Tarnas is talking about, things have to be looked at more in a complex archetypal way rather than from a perspective driving simplicity for the sake of definition.
I think the universe is moving us in that direction too. Look at the strides being made in medicine now with things like Pysilocibin. The chemical structure is big and complex - so much that some scientists have taken a leap of faith in trying to understand it. If we continue to develop more impactful medicines for our minds and our bodies, and get away from the single molecule modus of medicine currently, it's like we're getting back to nature. Our society and our civilization might be getting back to what was already done in the amazon 2000 years ago.
I know I'm stretching on some of this, but I've not communicated these thought with anyone other than my wife. When you run in science circles, it's a bit taboo to do what I'm doing. Like I said, I'm still learning and unsure how to communicate some of these themes. I am looking forward to exploring more of them, finishing this book by Tarnas and seeing what else there is out there.
I'm so happy I found this community where I can share such thoughts and learn how to explore them more. I'm sure what I'm doing isn't unique to the community here, but it is unique to me. It's one of the reasons why I'm so interested to have a psychedelic experience, I want to learn more, to understand my part. I have to say, during this period, I really started liking myself - I enjoy getting in my head now and wrestling with some ideas. I can say I never did that before like I did now. It's been a powerful personal journey. The thing that will really freak me out is that if I run my astrological chart and find out that this recent change of mine is related to an alignment promoting more creative thought and spiritual awakening. I haven't learned how to do that yet.