STILL "unsure of why" i don't/didn't > see these posts in real time>>>i never KNEW anyone wrote to me+
and said such NICE things to me…i am >not so -wasn't used to< being treated KINDLY.
WELL the last 13 years has been the "pits for me".
In every way possible…INJURY-big..big fire-me!
My mother passed away & ALL hell broke loose (?) with "siblings"
WHO don't remember ALL the "things' i have done for
them & decided to FCK it all up~
A memory & terror—ACTUAL "TERROR" i was put thru. While suffering a life-long MORPH into an insufferable; don't wanna be "dependent" on Narcs~as the only way i can move.
I did get my Med MJ "license" & yes-it is different than regular POT & can really help w/the pain-it's just SO EXPENSIVE in this state-everything is. OR that I don't think i get high === after 49 years of use OR the FACT that IT IS ALL THE SAME—GROWN IN SOMEONE'S BASEMENT…or JUST a vacant house.
Only for a couple of crops before the ELECTRIC COMPANY finds them. ALL THE SAME GREEN STUFF. nothing to ever get EXCITED ABOUT—yes, my DAYS of the "right connections" are LONG gone+
As i did take a lot of mental & PHYSICAL "ABUSE" from my bigamist husband of ten years-that was long ago=but still I took IT because we did (he did) get the best POT around —not like "we" didn't go to the POT.
And i "thought" everyone's wife just carried suitcases back and forth across the country. I NEVER THOUGHT to demand payment—i just thought IT was my "duty"! I had pix of REAL POT-like [lets see HOW close i can get to spelling this correctly] OAXCAN GOLD?
Don't tell me i GOT that right!? But that was my all time favorite. Of course I hadda make a couple of trips East & West…And i doubt that this HAPPENS to a "large extent" now-unless IT'S The GOVERNMENT like in the DEA which began right before I met my "old man" whom was actually an "ole man" AS he was 17 years my senior.
So i guess "you can imagine" how i was brain-washed into "thinking" NO one else would want me. AND now i can say that i was a really pretty girl-in hindsight. As i knew IT before i met him but was "taught" that was conceit. So i never put much "emphasis" on THAT FACT.
Or that i waited for him for years while he served an underserving "sentence' entrapped by the DEA in Manufacturing MDA—although now IT'S called MDMA-and i don't know why as what do i do? Call the DEA & ask?
THEY would know——as I did contact them once not so many years ago & ASK why they didn't arrest me?
As i was only 19 but i KNEW exactly what was going on. THOUGH other than carry pot back & forth-guess THEY didn't know?
Doubt it, though my parent's were friends w/the HEAD BCI guy in these parts. THE BCI..anyone ever hear of OR REMEMBER THEM?
They probably were transferred to either tthe CIA or the DEA—I don't know!
But outta 39 people-some wives only picked up the one & NEVER had any "dealings" with drugs other than possibly have a few hits once in awhile! i didn't get busted though-i guess HE knew my folks were just tax-paying fools, and i was SO young..
Don't think i escaped JUSTICE THOUGH—AS the cops never stopped hounding me from the day (back in NYS=where i had grown up) AND arresting me for anything ANYTHING AT ALL one could "imagine"~IT TRULY IS/WAS unbelievable.
Although i am somewhat "comforted" to find Lawyers on line that want "your story" in a site called "FLEX YOUR RIGHTS" now-that i am not ACTIVELY "pursued by Cops -stop correcting my spelling—IT'S KOPS!
the KKK and anyone who may be a "spy" here should love my "disclosures" as i don't give a fck anymore.
So thanks for those kind-wonderful posts that i never saw—and blame IT on the MAC. NOT a "sign of PRESTIGE for me" i hadda buy mine used.
SO can yah see me NOT ever ever uttering a word before? I DIDN'T i really DIDN'T speak until i left him. As i had HAD enough finally & all the pure acid-coke etc-"furnished by the DEA" so IT was the best—i would never have :experienced" had i not taken the
ABUSE===as you can "see" where my head IS AT+
I am certainly no "nun". As far as drugs go -anyway.
No one asked for this info—but i am too lazy (really TO UNSURE of my capability to write a book) but have to get IT outta me.
My life is SO alone & SO stuck in SOLITUDE—i was SO HAPPY to find this site-so accidentally. JUST kept searching on how to
grow Azures & one day THIS popped up.
I don't remember what seems to "be" the new member process THOUGH the Shroomery was still open.
And now i "hear' THERE are many displaced "members" from there "that have NO HOME"!
SO that's finally enough from me>>i can tell by how fast i am typing HOW much i must be saying as I NEVER edit anything or IT WOULD make even LESS "SENSE' than i do now.
Thanks for you ALL's kind-kind words to me..
I REALLY REALLY needed THAT today & was worth the wait-+