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This is WTF was going on with me lately. All is OK now, though.


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#1 niemandgeist

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    You make me happy in a manic sort of way :)

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Posted 28 September 2015 - 03:22 PM

Something happened recently. I had to do some things about it as a safety precaution. As we all know I have bipolar disorder so I obviously went off the deep end and was ranting and raving about odd things for a while, hardly sleeping, drinking way too much, and getting up to other strange things I can't recall. Nobody would believe the truth anyway.

 

Now that everything is OK and I'm squeaky clean after a nice long shower I can post here again, but I've decided to abandon all cube grows and just stick with edibles and medicinals from now on. I don't need the cubes anymore.

 

I'm happy to lay out what happened to people I know and trust from here in PM. It's an interesting story, but it's not fit for the public forums. I likely definitely overreacted big time, but hey, better safe than sorry.

 

I'm going to keep using this username to avoid confusion and whatnot.

 

I still intend on doing art for the people I promised and I want to eventually write that book. Unfortunately I lost lots of files and photos because I had to take safety precautions.

 

I look forward to interacting with you all again and I wonder what I've missed lately on here.

 

The important thing is that everything is cool now. :biggrin:


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#2 Alder Logs

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Posted 28 September 2015 - 03:38 PM

I was pretty sure I had a clue what was going on there.  If you can truly be who you say you aren't, it will be easier I'm sure.  With all that job and women stuff coming up, it had to be pretty hard to stay nobody.  Nobody doesn't have to be anything.  Nobody can have a job, or a girlfriend, and yet, not be that as an identity.  Nobody is all I care to be.  I watch out for being somebody and learn not to take any of those somebodies too seriously.  They all come and go as I watch.

 

Be at peace, niemandgeist. 


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#3 niemandgeist

niemandgeist

    You make me happy in a manic sort of way :)

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Posted 28 September 2015 - 03:57 PM

Indeed. It's been a bit odd here, but I think things are getting easier. I'm a nobody, a somebody, an associate, a leader, a loser, and a dreamer. I'm nothing and everything in between. It all depends on the time, the circumstances, and the company I keep.

 

There's a bit of truth in every lie I tell and a bit of misdirection in what seems to be complete honesty.

 

Or maybe I'm just stupid or crazy.

 

I'm the sort of person where I can tell you the whole truth and you'll insist I'm BS'ing you. I'm the kind of man who will BS you and you'll believe that over the truth. Not always, but sometimes.

 

People recently asked me for the truth. I tell them: Yes, I met a dominatrix and she looked like this and had this and we did this and that and then I did this and that with these other people just for fun... When your own family prefers that you lie to them rather than tell them the truth you know you're either totally nuts or playing the cards pretty well in your own favor.

 

Then they want to hear about the sojourn/extended fast and walking meditation I undertook recently and they still won't believe me. Now that's a tail for Storming the Gates that I'll post about in the near future. I wasn't ON anything but it was by far the most mystical experience of my entire life. Of course nobody will believe it, but hey, I'll write about it anyway.

 

I feel OK though and that's all that matters. Just a shame I had to scare away that one nice girl I met that nobody would ever approve of me associating with in the first place.



#4 SteampunkScientist

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Posted 28 September 2015 - 08:50 PM

Here for you man. Life can really suck ass sometimes. Then one day you look back only to realize just how much worse it might have been. Anyway, glad to have you back.

#5 happy4nic8r

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    cyans rule!!

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Posted 28 September 2015 - 08:55 PM

My wife said to me once. ... .... I need psychiatric help, but YOU won't go!!


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