Pot and dark thoughts
Posted 15 January 2016 - 10:14 PM
Posted 19 February 2016 - 01:34 AM
Sometimes when one has many many many issues with everything, other help should be sought.
Posted 20 February 2016 - 11:46 PM
i went 99% straight edge a few months ago and i don't feel like i'm missing anything, on the contrary! OK - i very much look forward for my next mushroom trip, but it can wait, i want it to ripen (too much other stuff to do, but can't wait to grow some mush). It's been two years...i can wait longer.
quit tobbaco ... best decision in my life - and i don't even know HOW i did it. I don't even think "I" did it, cause when "I" wanted to quit, it ended up with me kicking the wall randomly :D wall rage. couch rage. RAGE against the endocrine system. It sort of just happened. My "higher self" (or whatever the F.) grabbed my hand and said "come! let us go". And i let go.
Darci, do you smoke pure ganja or a joint with tobacco mix? couple of years ago i found tobbaco with weed killed all the fun for me. All the pure sensations. Tobbacoo kills my flow, blocks the channels, chakras, whatever...literally and metaphorically, metaphysically takes my breath away, in the negative sense. Don't know what it's called, but i feel it instantly. Nicotine is a real bitch. Studies done -> cause depression. Fucks up the reward system in your brains. big time.
Pure weed it was from then on.
But now...i had to stop. quit. everything. be myself. feel myself. get the fuck out of the bubble. the comfort zone. feel what comes by - snow on the thigh?
being able to open up to uncomfortable sensations helps making that happen. not violently....gently...to open up to this other part of the spectrum. Yea, warm is nice, we all love it...but cold...it's here, embrace it.
evil is here. i have to face it. I do it much better sober. Started getting high on sober:) kinda weird. now that i know how all these substances work on my mind... i can sort of make it happen. funny.
it lifts me up big time.
And yes...this world now a days.. fucked up. No denying that. But on weed, im just... (sorry to say, and it took me 10 years to admit it to myself) NOT THAT FUCKING EFFICIENT AT BATTLING THE POWERS THAT BE...! and i oughta be, for ..the future generations... cause the uncontrolable burst of laughter with my d makes me laugh harder than any drug ever. crazy, i would have never thought.
having said that, since i'm just 99% straight edge, i can't wait (but i can!) till the next casual spontaneous joint with me old pal, or maybe solo, playing guitar or admiring some plants, working some wood, or whatever will suit, and i know it'll hit me like in highschool. stuff be PURE.
holy shit, sorry for being so LOONG...you've inspired me to write something (see, not my fault, YOUR fault hahah.), i really hope i've spilled out anything of value.
Posted 22 February 2016 - 07:41 AM
ernestro... I don't mix pot with anything usually. Nine times out of ten when I get home from work I smoke, but the one time in ten I'll have red wine. Maybe once or twice a month I'll do both at the same time. No tobacco. I hate that shit mostly because of the smell. Maybe natural mapacho has some uses but I never took advantage of that opportunity when I was in Iquitos.
I love pot. I love it so much. My favorite strains are the ones high in CBD, I've tried a few. I found myself enjoying it the most when it was abundant in psychedelic properties. Music just came alive in so many new and pleasurable dimensions. I almost feel like the world is tragically boring and flat without it.
And it just so happens that right now I haven't smoked for a couple of days and I'm out. It's 5:30 AM and I have to go to work but I still haven't slept. This is as bad as withdrawal gets for me... loss of sleep, but I know it'll be ok in another day or two.
I'm usually a heavy smoker. I once got my hands on a quarter and wouldn't you know I was so ready to celebrate the coming 3-day weekend that I smoked it all before Friday night was over. I was just laughing with full awareness that I was smoking an incredible amount of pot.
Yes, I know there are veterans out there that can make me look like a newborn babe, but 7 grams in an evening is something that I still consider pretty athletic. I deserved a medal or something, but sadly there was no one else around to document my new record.
Posted 23 February 2016 - 10:08 AM
Do you find yourself having a lot of wild, vivid dreams after running out of herb?
Whenever I smoke daily for a long stretch and then stop for a bit it's like my mind catches up on a backlog of dreams that either don't happen or are completely forgotten whenever my body's THC levels are maintained above a certain point. Most people I know either don't smoke enough to inhibit dreaming or else they smoke a ton but never actually stop long enough for their dreams to return so I don't get the chance to hear about others' experiences very often (which I like to do in order to compare with my own so as to better understand which effects are a function of regular consumption and which may just be peculiar to me).
Posted 02 January 2017 - 05:49 PM
Moderation in ALL things.
If you over indulge in anything this life has to offer it puts you "out of balance" with your true physical nature.
Use. Enjoy, but do not abuse life's gifts and wonders.
Old hippie wisdom... karma is real and what you wish in your heart for others is what you will receive in life.